Unfortunately, the session with Lady Helena couldn't take place on Thursday. We haven't set a new date, yet, so i'm still in a state of nervous anticipation. I'm a little scared about the amount of pain i'll have to endure, but at the same time, i'm hoping for a chance to stroke a bit. My new strict chastity rules are having a big impact on me. I'm aroused half of the day and each time i would like to touch. I can't and this makes my feel very owned.
On Saturday, Domina Shelle released Her new recording, Sweet Manipulation. I can highly recommend it to anyone who doubts that hypnosis works or who thinks he can resist.
Domina opens the session by challenging the listener to resist and She keeps telling, that She'll not be trying to hypnotize the subject.
I tried really hard, but each time i listened, i found myself in a deep trance without noticing falling under. I would love to tell more about what She did, but somehow, that memories seem to be inaccessible to my conscious mind. I just love this session, because it's an awesome demonstration of my Owner's skills!
I'm a little scared...
Although my Owners were both pleased with my cleaning report, Lady Helena said, that our session on Thursday will be fun... for Her. Domina Shelle also hinted, that i might not like what Lady Helena will do to me. I had asked Lady Helena to test my pain limits, but this sounds like She is going to push me really hard. On the one hand, this turns me on. I'm fantasizing about a hard spanking, but Lady Helena knows my weak spots and i'm a little scared that She might use them against me.
My nipples are already sore from three days of torture and i know that they will be very sensitive until Thursday. I'm sure, that Lady Helena will not spare them.
So i will prepare myself mentally for a hard punishment and i know that i deserve it, because i have been lazy and disobedient.
My nipples are already sore from three days of torture and i know that they will be very sensitive until Thursday. I'm sure, that Lady Helena will not spare them.
So i will prepare myself mentally for a hard punishment and i know that i deserve it, because i have been lazy and disobedient.
Painful chores
My flat is spic and span again and i have learned my lesson... my maid-uniform with all the ruffles and the 6" heels is already hindering my movements on a normal cleaning day, but with my nipples clamped and the large butt-plug in it was worse than i had expected.
I did the first part of my cleaning on Saturday. After getting dressed, i slid in the plug. It's around 5cm wide, but with a good amount of lube, it was no problem to get in. When i clamped my nipples, i was surprised how sore they felt. Domina Shelle had instructed me to twist and pinch them during our session on Friday, but it hadn't felt that hard back then...
I started cleaning and immediately noticed, that due to the amount of ube i had used, it was difficult to keep the plug in. I finally secured it with a crotch-rope, but this had the effect to push on the plug whenever i bent over.
With some breaks to give my nipples a rest, i managed to do the laundry and half of the rooms. I would do the rest on Sunday.
Now i had finally time to listen to The Eraser a second time. I don't remember much of the brainwashing part, but i remember very well how horny the session made me. The file contains instructions to stroke and cum, but my new chastity rules didn't allow me to touch. Instead i was humping the air, desperate to have at least some of the pleasure and in fact, every time Domina said 'cum!', it brought me almost to the edge.
I started the Sunday morning with a hot soothing shower, but as i soaped my body and ran my hands over my chest, i almost screamed. My nipples were so sore already, cleaning would be even more difficult today.
Before starting with my chores, i quickly checked my emails. There was one from Lady Helena. Domina had instructed me to ask Her for a session and She had already responded and suggested Thursday. It wouldn't be Lady Helena if She hadn't added a little twist. For the next five days i will have to wear clamps on my already sore nipples for at least 15 minutes. My nipples will be very very sore on Thursday and i know that She will take advantage of that...
I finished the rest of my chores, but had to take longer breaks. My nipples were killing me and i was very relieved when i finally finished. But i am grateful for the pain. I have learned my lesson and am back on track as my Owners' sissy-maid...
I did the first part of my cleaning on Saturday. After getting dressed, i slid in the plug. It's around 5cm wide, but with a good amount of lube, it was no problem to get in. When i clamped my nipples, i was surprised how sore they felt. Domina Shelle had instructed me to twist and pinch them during our session on Friday, but it hadn't felt that hard back then...
I started cleaning and immediately noticed, that due to the amount of ube i had used, it was difficult to keep the plug in. I finally secured it with a crotch-rope, but this had the effect to push on the plug whenever i bent over.
With some breaks to give my nipples a rest, i managed to do the laundry and half of the rooms. I would do the rest on Sunday.
Now i had finally time to listen to The Eraser a second time. I don't remember much of the brainwashing part, but i remember very well how horny the session made me. The file contains instructions to stroke and cum, but my new chastity rules didn't allow me to touch. Instead i was humping the air, desperate to have at least some of the pleasure and in fact, every time Domina said 'cum!', it brought me almost to the edge.
I started the Sunday morning with a hot soothing shower, but as i soaped my body and ran my hands over my chest, i almost screamed. My nipples were so sore already, cleaning would be even more difficult today.
Before starting with my chores, i quickly checked my emails. There was one from Lady Helena. Domina had instructed me to ask Her for a session and She had already responded and suggested Thursday. It wouldn't be Lady Helena if She hadn't added a little twist. For the next five days i will have to wear clamps on my already sore nipples for at least 15 minutes. My nipples will be very very sore on Thursday and i know that She will take advantage of that...
I finished the rest of my chores, but had to take longer breaks. My nipples were killing me and i was very relieved when i finally finished. But i am grateful for the pain. I have learned my lesson and am back on track as my Owners' sissy-maid...
Stricter chastity
There has been no update from me for a while... my job had kept me busy and i was mentally exhausted in the evenings. I had started to feel less submissive and to neglect my maid duties.
I knew this had to change, but i was simply to stressed to do anything about it.
Then last weekend, Domina released Her newest session from the re-from school series, it's a lesson about submission, just what i had needed. It included the assignment to reflect what submission means for me and write Her an email about the topic.
I wrote how i had experienced the last few weeks and also that i had noticed how stroking on my own had been detrimental for my submissive feelings. I suggested to try how it would affect me if i would only permitted to touch during a call with Her or Lady Helena.
We had planned a call for Thursday, Domina Shelle had said that She wanted to try to make me cum from nipple-torture and we were also going to discuss new chastity rules. Unfortunately, the circumstances didn't allow us to talk freely, so we only chatted a bit and planned a new session for Friday.
I have been conditioned to Her voice that i had slipped into a light trance while we were talking. She didn't have to count me down or anything and when She suddenly told me to tell Her something about my life, i was unable to really think about it and just told Her the first thing that crossed my mind. I confessed, that i had neglected my maid duties. I had cleaned up a bit before the call, but my flat had been a mess and still not all rooms were presentable. I promised to clean everything this weekend and She made very clear that She inspected me to have everything flawless until Sunday evening.
Before ending the call, She also was so generous to send me the new training file for Her contracted slaves already, i had the honor to be the first slave to have it!
I don't want to spoil too much, but i think it's safe to tell that it's about slave laws. She tries a new technique in this session and while it didn't feel like i had been hypnotized very deeply, it was very effective. Even now, on Saturday morning, the rules of behavior that She taught me are going around in my head...
On Friday evening, it was finally playtime. As always, we chatted a bit at first, but then, Domina's voice slightly changed and i knew, that our session had begun. I'm not completely sure about the order of events, but i'll try to recall it as best as i can...
She told me to get a butt-plug, one that would stretch my hole and so i took the biggest one that i'd be able to insert without warming up first. I slowly worked it in, it hurt a bit and was slightly uncomfortable. For a moment, i thought that i should have chosen a slighly smaller size, but now i had to go through with it.
Domina Shelle allowed me to lie down on my bed and stroke while She had me tell Her how much i love my ass-hole being stretched and soon i relaxed and enjoyed myself. After a few minutes, She had me get my biggest dildo and while i was still stroking, She instructed me how to lick it, kiss the tip and finally suck it and all the time, She had me confirm that i love it, as good as i could with the dildo in my mouth...
I was almost getting near the edge, when She told me to stop sucking and rub the dildo against my sissy-clitty. I took me a while to figure out a technique that felt good, but i couldn't enjoy it for long, because Domina Shelle instructed me to slap my cock with the dildo. "Do it as hard as Lady Helena would...". I hate slapping my cock and balls, but my Owners love it and so once again i didn't hold back. My mind was screaming "not so hard!", but i was just obeying and my hands acting on their own.
I was finally allowed to suck the dildo again, but this time without stroking. I moaned and made slurping noises while Domina Shelle had me tell Her how much i love sucking Her strap-on and being fucked with it. Yes, i loved it and at first i didn't noticed when She slowly switched from talking about the dildo to referring to a real cock. I felt humiliated when i finally got aware of it, i never had a desire for male cocks, but still i kept repeating what She told me to say.
I could tell how much my Owner loved to humiliate me in this way. She told me how She'd tie me up and let Her slaves fuck me from both ends. My face had turned red from the humiliation and i was sweating, but somehow it also turned me on to be humiliated this way.
She continued to tell how i would be fucked repeatedly and filled with cum and i had to tell Her that i like it.
She finally let me stop and pull my butt-plug out, but only to have me fuck myself with the dildo. I was allowed to stroke again, when Domina suddenly began to talk about new chastity rules. I had been so overwhelmed by the session so far, that i had forgotten about my proposal!
Domina informed me, that from now on, it's not my cock anymore. It's Her's and Lady Helena's property and i may only touch it for sanitary reasons. I will only be permitted to stroke during a call with my Owners or with very explicit instructions, but i am to ignore all stroking instructions in a file or general assignments.
We ended the playtime without me being allowed an edge. The stroking and humiliation had only served to make me very horny, but Domina Shelle was still about to top it. She told me about video material She had been recording and even sent me two short clips. In one of them, She is wearing sexy Italian boots and swinging a crystal pendant. I have a very similar pair and in one of our next sessions, She will guide me through worshiping them.
In the other clip, She's putting on a pair of shoes... but not any pair, it's a pair i bought for Her! I love the clip!
So now i have two short videos showing the sexiest feet and legs in this universe and i'm in strict chastity. Isn't that mean?
She also gave me Her awesome new file The Eraser. I felt very honored to be the first slave to have it. She's always so good to me and of course, i will send Her a tribute for all that kindness!
I figure i should start cleaning now, there's a lot of work to do. Domina has instructed me to wear the largest butt-plug and nipple-clamps while i'm cleaning which will probably slow me down a bit...
I will write about the new file and how the cleaning went later this weekend..
I knew this had to change, but i was simply to stressed to do anything about it.
Then last weekend, Domina released Her newest session from the re-from school series, it's a lesson about submission, just what i had needed. It included the assignment to reflect what submission means for me and write Her an email about the topic.
I wrote how i had experienced the last few weeks and also that i had noticed how stroking on my own had been detrimental for my submissive feelings. I suggested to try how it would affect me if i would only permitted to touch during a call with Her or Lady Helena.
We had planned a call for Thursday, Domina Shelle had said that She wanted to try to make me cum from nipple-torture and we were also going to discuss new chastity rules. Unfortunately, the circumstances didn't allow us to talk freely, so we only chatted a bit and planned a new session for Friday.
I have been conditioned to Her voice that i had slipped into a light trance while we were talking. She didn't have to count me down or anything and when She suddenly told me to tell Her something about my life, i was unable to really think about it and just told Her the first thing that crossed my mind. I confessed, that i had neglected my maid duties. I had cleaned up a bit before the call, but my flat had been a mess and still not all rooms were presentable. I promised to clean everything this weekend and She made very clear that She inspected me to have everything flawless until Sunday evening.
Before ending the call, She also was so generous to send me the new training file for Her contracted slaves already, i had the honor to be the first slave to have it!
I don't want to spoil too much, but i think it's safe to tell that it's about slave laws. She tries a new technique in this session and while it didn't feel like i had been hypnotized very deeply, it was very effective. Even now, on Saturday morning, the rules of behavior that She taught me are going around in my head...
On Friday evening, it was finally playtime. As always, we chatted a bit at first, but then, Domina's voice slightly changed and i knew, that our session had begun. I'm not completely sure about the order of events, but i'll try to recall it as best as i can...
She told me to get a butt-plug, one that would stretch my hole and so i took the biggest one that i'd be able to insert without warming up first. I slowly worked it in, it hurt a bit and was slightly uncomfortable. For a moment, i thought that i should have chosen a slighly smaller size, but now i had to go through with it.
Domina Shelle allowed me to lie down on my bed and stroke while She had me tell Her how much i love my ass-hole being stretched and soon i relaxed and enjoyed myself. After a few minutes, She had me get my biggest dildo and while i was still stroking, She instructed me how to lick it, kiss the tip and finally suck it and all the time, She had me confirm that i love it, as good as i could with the dildo in my mouth...
I was almost getting near the edge, when She told me to stop sucking and rub the dildo against my sissy-clitty. I took me a while to figure out a technique that felt good, but i couldn't enjoy it for long, because Domina Shelle instructed me to slap my cock with the dildo. "Do it as hard as Lady Helena would...". I hate slapping my cock and balls, but my Owners love it and so once again i didn't hold back. My mind was screaming "not so hard!", but i was just obeying and my hands acting on their own.
I was finally allowed to suck the dildo again, but this time without stroking. I moaned and made slurping noises while Domina Shelle had me tell Her how much i love sucking Her strap-on and being fucked with it. Yes, i loved it and at first i didn't noticed when She slowly switched from talking about the dildo to referring to a real cock. I felt humiliated when i finally got aware of it, i never had a desire for male cocks, but still i kept repeating what She told me to say.
I could tell how much my Owner loved to humiliate me in this way. She told me how She'd tie me up and let Her slaves fuck me from both ends. My face had turned red from the humiliation and i was sweating, but somehow it also turned me on to be humiliated this way.
She continued to tell how i would be fucked repeatedly and filled with cum and i had to tell Her that i like it.
She finally let me stop and pull my butt-plug out, but only to have me fuck myself with the dildo. I was allowed to stroke again, when Domina suddenly began to talk about new chastity rules. I had been so overwhelmed by the session so far, that i had forgotten about my proposal!
Domina informed me, that from now on, it's not my cock anymore. It's Her's and Lady Helena's property and i may only touch it for sanitary reasons. I will only be permitted to stroke during a call with my Owners or with very explicit instructions, but i am to ignore all stroking instructions in a file or general assignments.
We ended the playtime without me being allowed an edge. The stroking and humiliation had only served to make me very horny, but Domina Shelle was still about to top it. She told me about video material She had been recording and even sent me two short clips. In one of them, She is wearing sexy Italian boots and swinging a crystal pendant. I have a very similar pair and in one of our next sessions, She will guide me through worshiping them.
In the other clip, She's putting on a pair of shoes... but not any pair, it's a pair i bought for Her! I love the clip!
So now i have two short videos showing the sexiest feet and legs in this universe and i'm in strict chastity. Isn't that mean?
She also gave me Her awesome new file The Eraser. I felt very honored to be the first slave to have it. She's always so good to me and of course, i will send Her a tribute for all that kindness!
I figure i should start cleaning now, there's a lot of work to do. Domina has instructed me to wear the largest butt-plug and nipple-clamps while i'm cleaning which will probably slow me down a bit...
I will write about the new file and how the cleaning went later this weekend..
Triggered to cum
Domina Shelle has prepared a very special treat for Her contracted slaves in this month's training session. The title of the file already gave a hint, so i was looking forward to try it from the moment i received the file.
In the evening, i finally could listen. At first, i didn't feel like i was falling very deep, but as Domina had me imagine Her taking me by the hand and guiding me down a staircase while She counted me down, i fell quickly. I don't even remember the second half of the count-down...
Once She had me in a deep trance, She unwound a sexy fantasy. I was lying on the bed in the darkened room as the door opened and She entered. She climbed onto the bed, teased me and straddled my body and everything She described felt very real in my imagination. It's always easy for Her to get me aroused with only a few words, but this time, it felt even stronger.
She turned me on more and more, bringing me closer to the edge until my cock was bouncing up and down and i was thrusting my hips like i was trying to rub against Her.
When She finally commanded me to cum, my mind exploded. I was cumming hard, but without ejaculating. My head was spinning and my muscles contracting rhythmically. Since i hadn't ejaculated, i stayed highly aroused and the orgasm went on for several minutes before it started to fade away very slowly.
Domina ended the session with getting me aroused again. It wouldn't have been necessary, because i still was, but it helped to make me wanting to listen again. If it hadn't been bedtime, i would have listened at least once more...
Even without ejaculating, this session let me experience one of the longest and best orgasms i ever had. I will for sure listen often to this session and i'm optimistic that after a few times, i will also be able to ejaculate hands-free...
In the evening, i finally could listen. At first, i didn't feel like i was falling very deep, but as Domina had me imagine Her taking me by the hand and guiding me down a staircase while She counted me down, i fell quickly. I don't even remember the second half of the count-down...
Once She had me in a deep trance, She unwound a sexy fantasy. I was lying on the bed in the darkened room as the door opened and She entered. She climbed onto the bed, teased me and straddled my body and everything She described felt very real in my imagination. It's always easy for Her to get me aroused with only a few words, but this time, it felt even stronger.
She turned me on more and more, bringing me closer to the edge until my cock was bouncing up and down and i was thrusting my hips like i was trying to rub against Her.
When She finally commanded me to cum, my mind exploded. I was cumming hard, but without ejaculating. My head was spinning and my muscles contracting rhythmically. Since i hadn't ejaculated, i stayed highly aroused and the orgasm went on for several minutes before it started to fade away very slowly.
Domina ended the session with getting me aroused again. It wouldn't have been necessary, because i still was, but it helped to make me wanting to listen again. If it hadn't been bedtime, i would have listened at least once more...
Even without ejaculating, this session let me experience one of the longest and best orgasms i ever had. I will for sure listen often to this session and i'm optimistic that after a few times, i will also be able to ejaculate hands-free...
Ass-fucked
A while ago, i had asked Lady Helena, what toy or device She would like to use on me if She could have any device She could wish for. Her answer was surprisingly simple, She wanted to fuck my ass...
I already had built the prototype of my remote-controlled fucking-machine at that point, so adding the final touches, like a vac-u-lock adapter with a bigger dildo didn't take long. However, until now we hadn't used the machine, we had always done other fun things during our sessions.
I was a little nervous before the call, because although i'm very used to wearing butt-plugs, i had never used the machine for longer than a few minutes during testing and also when i use a dildo on myself, i usually loose interest pretty fast. I knew that i was in for a new experience and knowing Lady Helena, i also knew that it would get intense.
She had told me that She might allow me to cum and i really had been looking forward to it. She allowed me to stroke while She controlled the speed of the fucking-machine, but when She started to have me repeat sentences about why i don't deserve to cum, i was very surprised. Had She changed Her mind and i would be denied after getting fucked in the ass?
She told me to stroke faster while She increased the speed of the machine, too. The unused sensation in my ass was getting a little uncomfortable, but after changing my position slightly, i managed to get comfortable again and enjoy it.
Lady Helena started to count. She told me to get closer with every number and on 22, i would be allowed to cum. I knew that it wouldn't be that easy, so i wasn't surprised when She started over at one a few times. It was a surprise when i finally heard Her say '22!'. I hadn't expected it and it took me off guard. I was cumming automatically without even trying to and it felt awesome while getting fucked.
A new sentence popped up for me to repeat: "i don’t deserve to cum, because it is not allowed to think about an orgasm - and i just did."
Had i just done something wrong? Judging from Lady Helena's giggling, i had just fallen into Her trap. I started to worry...
After leaving me puzzled for a moment, She revealed that She had originally planned to stop at 21, but changed Her mind and allowed me release. I had done nothing wrong and She was only being amused about my confusion. She is so generous to me!
I'm already looking forward to the next time getting fucked (i'm already thinking about some tweaks for the machine), but the next session will be about testing my pain threshold and before that, Domina Shelle wants to try and make me cum from nipple-torture...
I already had built the prototype of my remote-controlled fucking-machine at that point, so adding the final touches, like a vac-u-lock adapter with a bigger dildo didn't take long. However, until now we hadn't used the machine, we had always done other fun things during our sessions.
I was a little nervous before the call, because although i'm very used to wearing butt-plugs, i had never used the machine for longer than a few minutes during testing and also when i use a dildo on myself, i usually loose interest pretty fast. I knew that i was in for a new experience and knowing Lady Helena, i also knew that it would get intense.
She had told me that She might allow me to cum and i really had been looking forward to it. She allowed me to stroke while She controlled the speed of the fucking-machine, but when She started to have me repeat sentences about why i don't deserve to cum, i was very surprised. Had She changed Her mind and i would be denied after getting fucked in the ass?
She told me to stroke faster while She increased the speed of the machine, too. The unused sensation in my ass was getting a little uncomfortable, but after changing my position slightly, i managed to get comfortable again and enjoy it.
Lady Helena started to count. She told me to get closer with every number and on 22, i would be allowed to cum. I knew that it wouldn't be that easy, so i wasn't surprised when She started over at one a few times. It was a surprise when i finally heard Her say '22!'. I hadn't expected it and it took me off guard. I was cumming automatically without even trying to and it felt awesome while getting fucked.
A new sentence popped up for me to repeat: "i don’t deserve to cum, because it is not allowed to think about an orgasm - and i just did."
Had i just done something wrong? Judging from Lady Helena's giggling, i had just fallen into Her trap. I started to worry...
After leaving me puzzled for a moment, She revealed that She had originally planned to stop at 21, but changed Her mind and allowed me release. I had done nothing wrong and She was only being amused about my confusion. She is so generous to me!
I'm already looking forward to the next time getting fucked (i'm already thinking about some tweaks for the machine), but the next session will be about testing my pain threshold and before that, Domina Shelle wants to try and make me cum from nipple-torture...
Halloween Princess
Domina Shelle's Halloween sessions are always something special, but this year's left me speechless. I have listened to so many files of my Owner, but no other was as immersive as Halloween Princess.
Telling too much about the story would probably spoil the experience, but i think i can tell, that the feeling of Domina Shelle's presence and Her touch was extremely real.
There was an unexpected twist in the story just when i thought, that the session would come to an end and things got a little scary. I felt so helpless, but horny at the same time.
I don't know why, but i was giggling hard when the scary part suddenly ended. I think it was mainly because of the relieve that i was safe and i suddenly felt very happy and peaceful.
I had come slightly out of trance when i stopped giggling and focussed on Domina's voice again. She had already started to talk me into sleep before leaving me alone. I lay on my bed for quite a while before i woke up and enjoyed all the feelings that i had experienced.
Telling too much about the story would probably spoil the experience, but i think i can tell, that the feeling of Domina Shelle's presence and Her touch was extremely real.
There was an unexpected twist in the story just when i thought, that the session would come to an end and things got a little scary. I felt so helpless, but horny at the same time.
I don't know why, but i was giggling hard when the scary part suddenly ended. I think it was mainly because of the relieve that i was safe and i suddenly felt very happy and peaceful.
I had come slightly out of trance when i stopped giggling and focussed on Domina's voice again. She had already started to talk me into sleep before leaving me alone. I lay on my bed for quite a while before i woke up and enjoyed all the feelings that i had experienced.
Forced Orgasms
My two days of listening to Drain turned out harder than i had expected. I listened for the first time on Sunday afternoon and was looking forward to the experience.
After taking me into trance, Lady Helena allowed me to stroke. It didn't take long until i wanted to cum and luckily, She told me to go faster. I was a little surprised when She told me to pause the file, cum as quick as possible and then continue to listen.
I paused the file, it was about half way through, and stoked until i came, then i resumed the file. I was not surprised, that i was taken into trance again. I didn't feel like stroking any more, but i could not resist Lady Helena's instructions. Trying to make myself cum again was no fun, but i had to obey. She told me to pause and cum again an this time, it took me long to force myself with hard strokes.
The file wasn't over yet. I started it again after a couple of minutes, i was left with the instructions to cum once more. The file had ended, but i had to continue stroking. I tried, but i couldn't get my cock hard any more and finally i gave up.
I listened again on Sunday evening and Monday morning with the same results. Only two orgasms...
After a hard day, i felt very tired, but i wanted to give it another try at least. This time, even the first orgasm was difficult and it took me ages to cum. Feeling totally drained, i gave up afterwards.
I didn't expect that this assignment would be such a test of obedience, almost a punishment. I really hope, that Lady Helena will not be displeased with my results.
Tomorrow, i will be available for my Owners the whole day. I will get assignments throughout the day, will get teased and maybe have a call with my Owners. I don't know what they will have me do, but i'm looking forward to being controlled for a while day!
After taking me into trance, Lady Helena allowed me to stroke. It didn't take long until i wanted to cum and luckily, She told me to go faster. I was a little surprised when She told me to pause the file, cum as quick as possible and then continue to listen.
I paused the file, it was about half way through, and stoked until i came, then i resumed the file. I was not surprised, that i was taken into trance again. I didn't feel like stroking any more, but i could not resist Lady Helena's instructions. Trying to make myself cum again was no fun, but i had to obey. She told me to pause and cum again an this time, it took me long to force myself with hard strokes.
The file wasn't over yet. I started it again after a couple of minutes, i was left with the instructions to cum once more. The file had ended, but i had to continue stroking. I tried, but i couldn't get my cock hard any more and finally i gave up.
I listened again on Sunday evening and Monday morning with the same results. Only two orgasms...
After a hard day, i felt very tired, but i wanted to give it another try at least. This time, even the first orgasm was difficult and it took me ages to cum. Feeling totally drained, i gave up afterwards.
I didn't expect that this assignment would be such a test of obedience, almost a punishment. I really hope, that Lady Helena will not be displeased with my results.
Tomorrow, i will be available for my Owners the whole day. I will get assignments throughout the day, will get teased and maybe have a call with my Owners. I don't know what they will have me do, but i'm looking forward to being controlled for a while day!
Bootcamp graduation
I have finished my second boot-camp training. It was a hard 4 weeks, mainly because of the restrictions in daily life like the diet and daily exercise and the limited TV, internet and social life.
Since i had already graduated once, Lady Helena altered the ceremony this time and catered to my desire to suffer for Her amusement.
Like She had instructed, i waited for Her with clover-clamps on my nipples and my ass-hole plugged. After some initial chat, She took me into trance while i was kneeling. She knows, that my knees are my weak spot and how uncomfortable i am on my knees. She also told me to squeeze the clamps hard until i was moaning from pain. It's fascinating how much pain i can inflect on myself when She tells me. I wouldn't endure that if i would be on my own, but for Her, i don't hold back.
She finally allowed me to sit down and while i was bouncing on the plug,, i was allowed to stroke. But of course there was a catch. Every 5 strokes, i had to snap a rubber-band onto my cock. Again, i pulled the rubber-band hard before releasing it. I know how much Lady Helena enjoys to hear my moans of pain and i wanted them to be genuine for Her.
I was finally granted release, very needed after all the edging last week... and it won't be the last... Lady Helena instructed me to listen to Drain for the next two days and cum as often as possible. I don't know the recording yet, but the description and reviews tell me that it's about forced orgasms, so i'm looking forward to find out.
So, to finish with, would i like to do another round of boot-camp? Not really, the 4 weeks were hard and i'm not very eager to go through them again. But i would not hesitate a second if Lady Helena asked me (and i'm sure She will), because i want to obey and please Her!
Since i had already graduated once, Lady Helena altered the ceremony this time and catered to my desire to suffer for Her amusement.
Like She had instructed, i waited for Her with clover-clamps on my nipples and my ass-hole plugged. After some initial chat, She took me into trance while i was kneeling. She knows, that my knees are my weak spot and how uncomfortable i am on my knees. She also told me to squeeze the clamps hard until i was moaning from pain. It's fascinating how much pain i can inflect on myself when She tells me. I wouldn't endure that if i would be on my own, but for Her, i don't hold back.
She finally allowed me to sit down and while i was bouncing on the plug,, i was allowed to stroke. But of course there was a catch. Every 5 strokes, i had to snap a rubber-band onto my cock. Again, i pulled the rubber-band hard before releasing it. I know how much Lady Helena enjoys to hear my moans of pain and i wanted them to be genuine for Her.
I was finally granted release, very needed after all the edging last week... and it won't be the last... Lady Helena instructed me to listen to Drain for the next two days and cum as often as possible. I don't know the recording yet, but the description and reviews tell me that it's about forced orgasms, so i'm looking forward to find out.
So, to finish with, would i like to do another round of boot-camp? Not really, the 4 weeks were hard and i'm not very eager to go through them again. But i would not hesitate a second if Lady Helena asked me (and i'm sure She will), because i want to obey and please Her!
Electro-torture
Once again, Lady Helena has read my mind and made one of my fantasies come true.
Like we had agreed, i started to tie myself down shortly before the appointed time. I used a set of medical restraints on my ankles and thighs to pin my legs to the bed. Then i connected the estim-device. One channel on the base of my cock, the other on the head and the common pole connected to a buttplug. After blindfolding myself and putting on the headset, i cuffed my hands to the headboard. The timer for the magnetic cuffs was set to 90 minutes, but we had agreed that Lady Helena was free to modify it.
So i was lying there, blindfolded and unable to free myself while i was waiting for Lady Helena to call. From time to time, i though to feel a tingle on my cock. Was Lady Helena already playing with the estim-device?
I was already loosing track of time, when i heard noise in the headphones. It might have been 10 minutes, maybe 15, but now Lady Helena was there. She didn't waste much time and started to take me into trance after setting the estim-device to a low level.
The deeper She took me, the stronger She turned the stimulation and i was starting to worry if i could withstand the session without cumming.
Once i was deep in trance, Lady Helena told me to focus on the pain, while She turned up the power until i was moaning. I clenched my muscles to stay away from the edge and without noticing it, this made me focus on the pain and forget the pleasure.
I found out that this was exactly what She intended as She installed the post-hypnotic suggestion, that i will always feel this pain and my muscles clenching if i try to cum without permission. She continued to torture me with waves of intense stimulation and i cold hear how much fun She had making me moan from the mix of pain and pleasure.
Our call came to an end, but the real torture was only about to start. Lady Helena didn't wake me up, but only informed me that She would leave me tied for a while and come back to play with the estim from time to time. I begged Her to turn the stimulation down a bit since i was afraid that i won't be able to hold back. She was amused that i was begging and turned the power down a bit.
She reminded me, that i must confess if i should cum and that i would get punished, then She hung up.
It didn't take long before i felt the stimulation getting stronger again. I fought hard to ignore the pleasure and focus on the pain. It was not the punishment or failing the boot-camp that concerned me most, but the post-orgasm torture that i would be subjected to. I'm getting so sensitive when i cum, that continued stimulation with the estim-device is pure agony. And i would have no means to beg for mercy...
So i was left laying on my bed, with the the stimulation on a low level. I was expecting to have to wait for the first wave, but Lady Helena seemed to have way too much fun and didn't give me much of a break. She had said that She would play every few minutes, but for me, the breaks seemed like only seconds. I tried to calm down as good as possible during the breaks and when the waves hit, i was moaning, sometimes whimpering. Somehow i was hoping, that She had only turned Her microphone off and was still hearing me...
I was exhausted when the magnets finally turned off and released me. Fighting against the pleasure was a new experience for me and while it was hard and a little frustrating, i had as much fun as Lady Helena!
Like we had agreed, i started to tie myself down shortly before the appointed time. I used a set of medical restraints on my ankles and thighs to pin my legs to the bed. Then i connected the estim-device. One channel on the base of my cock, the other on the head and the common pole connected to a buttplug. After blindfolding myself and putting on the headset, i cuffed my hands to the headboard. The timer for the magnetic cuffs was set to 90 minutes, but we had agreed that Lady Helena was free to modify it.
So i was lying there, blindfolded and unable to free myself while i was waiting for Lady Helena to call. From time to time, i though to feel a tingle on my cock. Was Lady Helena already playing with the estim-device?
I was already loosing track of time, when i heard noise in the headphones. It might have been 10 minutes, maybe 15, but now Lady Helena was there. She didn't waste much time and started to take me into trance after setting the estim-device to a low level.
The deeper She took me, the stronger She turned the stimulation and i was starting to worry if i could withstand the session without cumming.
Once i was deep in trance, Lady Helena told me to focus on the pain, while She turned up the power until i was moaning. I clenched my muscles to stay away from the edge and without noticing it, this made me focus on the pain and forget the pleasure.
I found out that this was exactly what She intended as She installed the post-hypnotic suggestion, that i will always feel this pain and my muscles clenching if i try to cum without permission. She continued to torture me with waves of intense stimulation and i cold hear how much fun She had making me moan from the mix of pain and pleasure.
Our call came to an end, but the real torture was only about to start. Lady Helena didn't wake me up, but only informed me that She would leave me tied for a while and come back to play with the estim from time to time. I begged Her to turn the stimulation down a bit since i was afraid that i won't be able to hold back. She was amused that i was begging and turned the power down a bit.
She reminded me, that i must confess if i should cum and that i would get punished, then She hung up.
It didn't take long before i felt the stimulation getting stronger again. I fought hard to ignore the pleasure and focus on the pain. It was not the punishment or failing the boot-camp that concerned me most, but the post-orgasm torture that i would be subjected to. I'm getting so sensitive when i cum, that continued stimulation with the estim-device is pure agony. And i would have no means to beg for mercy...
So i was left laying on my bed, with the the stimulation on a low level. I was expecting to have to wait for the first wave, but Lady Helena seemed to have way too much fun and didn't give me much of a break. She had said that She would play every few minutes, but for me, the breaks seemed like only seconds. I tried to calm down as good as possible during the breaks and when the waves hit, i was moaning, sometimes whimpering. Somehow i was hoping, that She had only turned Her microphone off and was still hearing me...
I was exhausted when the magnets finally turned off and released me. Fighting against the pleasure was a new experience for me and while it was hard and a little frustrating, i had as much fun as Lady Helena!
Back to boot-camp
Lady Helena is doing another round of Her Boot Camp with a new group of recruits and She had invited me to join again. Even if it was an invitation and the last boot-camp was hard, i didn't dare to decline Her offer. For me it was an order and i didn't hesitate to accept.
Of course, since i already graduated, She expects me to do even better this time and She has also put me on a stricter regime than the new recruits.
So like last time, i'm back on daily exercise and a diet, no read meat, nothing fried and worst of all, no cheese and only water to drink (except one coffee per day).
The additional instructions for me include no stroking at all, eating 3 meals from a bowl on the floor this week and having 2 ice-cubes up my ass every time i shower (something i really dislike).
Especially the dietary restrictions are already bugging me and i have asked myself if i would have joined if i had remembered how i disliked them the last time. But would that have been a reason? The fact that Lady Helena invited me means that She wants me to participate and since the restrictions of my personal life are a major part of the boot-camp training, this can't be a reason to chicken out.
The fact that i joined without thinking about the implications is also a proof of how powerful Her control has become. Even without being directly instructed, i anticipate what She wants me to do. Her will overrides my conscious mind and i obey without thinking about it.
Of course, since i already graduated, She expects me to do even better this time and She has also put me on a stricter regime than the new recruits.
So like last time, i'm back on daily exercise and a diet, no read meat, nothing fried and worst of all, no cheese and only water to drink (except one coffee per day).
The additional instructions for me include no stroking at all, eating 3 meals from a bowl on the floor this week and having 2 ice-cubes up my ass every time i shower (something i really dislike).
Especially the dietary restrictions are already bugging me and i have asked myself if i would have joined if i had remembered how i disliked them the last time. But would that have been a reason? The fact that Lady Helena invited me means that She wants me to participate and since the restrictions of my personal life are a major part of the boot-camp training, this can't be a reason to chicken out.
The fact that i joined without thinking about the implications is also a proof of how powerful Her control has become. Even without being directly instructed, i anticipate what She wants me to do. Her will overrides my conscious mind and i obey without thinking about it.
Hot dreams
After my latest punishment, Domina has decided, that i need to be spanked more frequently, so my skin doesn't brake so fast. She instructed me to administer 30 strokes this weekend, which i was looking forward to a lot.
I think it was this anticipation which triggered a hot dream last night. Domina Shelle and Lady Helena were punishing me, but no matter what implement they were using to spank me, i was enjoying it too much for their taste. So they administered a big enema and handed me a diaper that was thickly covered in deep heat or some other kind of casaicin creme. I have once expirienced Finalgon on my balls and since then it scares the crap out of me. Even in my dream i was scared and i begged them to for mercy. I begged until they showed mercy, but they didn't allow me to use the toilet. I was fighting not to make a mess, but i knew, that i finally would have to use the diaper.
I woke up at this point, on the one hand regretting that the dream ended, but on the other hand, i was glad, that the ordeal was over.
I administered the spanking in the afternoon. My skin didn't break this time, but Domina said, that i must take 20 more strokes if my ass isn't sore tomorrow. I don't think it will be, so i'll have another spanking ahead.
I think it was this anticipation which triggered a hot dream last night. Domina Shelle and Lady Helena were punishing me, but no matter what implement they were using to spank me, i was enjoying it too much for their taste. So they administered a big enema and handed me a diaper that was thickly covered in deep heat or some other kind of casaicin creme. I have once expirienced Finalgon on my balls and since then it scares the crap out of me. Even in my dream i was scared and i begged them to for mercy. I begged until they showed mercy, but they didn't allow me to use the toilet. I was fighting not to make a mess, but i knew, that i finally would have to use the diaper.
I woke up at this point, on the one hand regretting that the dream ended, but on the other hand, i was glad, that the ordeal was over.
I administered the spanking in the afternoon. My skin didn't break this time, but Domina said, that i must take 20 more strokes if my ass isn't sore tomorrow. I don't think it will be, so i'll have another spanking ahead.
Caned for sloppy work
After we had to reschedule a few times, i finally got my deserved spanking for sloppy dusting yesterday evening. I was going to receive 20 strokes for the dusting and a birthday spanking on top.
Before we started, Lady Helena instructed me to shove two ice-cubes up my ass. She likes to do that, much more than i do. The initial cold is quite uncomfortable and when the ice has molten, it creates the constant urge to expel the water, like a tiny enema...
Lady Helena informed me, that i won't have to count the strokes, because She was going to administer them randomly while She used the ON and OFF triggers from Trigger of Insanity.
So She triggered me to stroke and started to cane my ass. She did a great job at distracting my thoughts by sexy talk, having me tell Her about my fantasies and using the triggers and so She was able to catch me by surprise with many of the strokes, each time triggering a moan of pain and pleasure from me.
After about 30 strokes, She gave me a choice. I could either ask for 30 more at the same strength or less strokes but with increasing strength. My ass was already covered in welts and i had gotten used to the pain, so i asked Her to increase the strength. This time She didn't surprise me, but helped me by having me breathe in deeply before each stroke.
The first few strokes were bearable, but then i re-positioned myself slightly to avoid being hit on the already bruised spots and the next stroke landed directly on the spot between my ass-cheeks and my thighs. OUCH! I shifted back a little and the next stroke landed on an already bruised area again.
A few strokes later, i noticed that my skin was breaking and the first drops of blood landed on the floor. I informed Lady Helena, She didn't want to bruise me to much and suggested to stop.
Since the spanking-machine was already armed and ready to strike, i asked for that final stroke, which was at 75% strength. This is the highest setting i have tried so far and i was glad that Lady Helena had suggested to stop...
But our session wasn't finished yet. Since i wasn't allowed to cum, Lady Helena decided that my cock needed to be cooled down. So She ordered me to fill a glass with ice-water and hang my cock into it for 5 minutes. I hated it from the first moment, it wasn't as painful as the spanking, but a kind of pain that didn't arouse me. It just sucked. Lady Helena reminded me of my safeword, but i didn't want to chicken out and use it. After all i was suffering for Her amusement and i could hear how much fun She had. She had mercy after 3 minutes, but seemed to be delighted to have found another weak spot of me. I'm going to avoid giving Her a reason to punish me even more than before...
Before we started, Lady Helena instructed me to shove two ice-cubes up my ass. She likes to do that, much more than i do. The initial cold is quite uncomfortable and when the ice has molten, it creates the constant urge to expel the water, like a tiny enema...
Lady Helena informed me, that i won't have to count the strokes, because She was going to administer them randomly while She used the ON and OFF triggers from Trigger of Insanity.
So She triggered me to stroke and started to cane my ass. She did a great job at distracting my thoughts by sexy talk, having me tell Her about my fantasies and using the triggers and so She was able to catch me by surprise with many of the strokes, each time triggering a moan of pain and pleasure from me.
After about 30 strokes, She gave me a choice. I could either ask for 30 more at the same strength or less strokes but with increasing strength. My ass was already covered in welts and i had gotten used to the pain, so i asked Her to increase the strength. This time She didn't surprise me, but helped me by having me breathe in deeply before each stroke.
The first few strokes were bearable, but then i re-positioned myself slightly to avoid being hit on the already bruised spots and the next stroke landed directly on the spot between my ass-cheeks and my thighs. OUCH! I shifted back a little and the next stroke landed on an already bruised area again.
A few strokes later, i noticed that my skin was breaking and the first drops of blood landed on the floor. I informed Lady Helena, She didn't want to bruise me to much and suggested to stop.
Since the spanking-machine was already armed and ready to strike, i asked for that final stroke, which was at 75% strength. This is the highest setting i have tried so far and i was glad that Lady Helena had suggested to stop...
But our session wasn't finished yet. Since i wasn't allowed to cum, Lady Helena decided that my cock needed to be cooled down. So She ordered me to fill a glass with ice-water and hang my cock into it for 5 minutes. I hated it from the first moment, it wasn't as painful as the spanking, but a kind of pain that didn't arouse me. It just sucked. Lady Helena reminded me of my safeword, but i didn't want to chicken out and use it. After all i was suffering for Her amusement and i could hear how much fun She had. She had mercy after 3 minutes, but seemed to be delighted to have found another weak spot of me. I'm going to avoid giving Her a reason to punish me even more than before...
Shopping with my Owner
I had invited Domina Shelle for an online shopping-tour as a birthday gift and yesterday evening, we had a call to do exactly that.
While She was getting ready to talk, She gave me some instructions in chat, first to mantra and edge and then to clean the kitchen sink. Once i was finished, She called and we began to shop.
She had already instructed me earlier to find shoes of a certain style that She liked and so i sent Her the links. I had also added another pair that i though would look great on Her sexy feet and She liked all of them.
So it didn't take long before She had decided and i ordered two pairs of shoes for Her.
We continued to talk and my beautiful Owner shared some photos with me that She hadn't published yet. Then She told me to stand up and walk up and down in my 6" heels while She instructed me how to walk and sway my hips. I don't have enough practice with walking in high-heels, so i was panting after a few minutes and She finally allowed me to sit down again. Next, She showed me how to moan like a girl and i followed Her example. Moaning together was fun and exciting!
Since my own birthday had only been a week before Her's, She asked if i wanted to buy something for myself, too. I had already expected that and sent Her the link to a cute latex mask that i had been considering. I had been unable to decide for one or two hair-pieces and the colors, so i asked for Her decision. She liked the version with two ponytails best and we both agreed that the colors like on the photo would look best with my maid uniform.
We continued to talk about my fetish clothing and the toys i have and i shared some photos with Her and soon our time was up.
She didn't let me go without some instructions. First i was allowed to use my fleshlight to edge 3 times while wearing nipple-clamps. I had to practice moaning while i edged and although it was a bit odd at first and i soon started to enjoy it.
Then i prepared for bedtime. Domina Shelle wanted me to sleep chained to my bed, so i chained my hands to the headboard. It was not the first time i had tried to sleep tied, but it had always excited me too much to be able to sleep. This time was no different, but unlike the other times, i didn't dare to disobey and untie myself. I finally fell asleep and during the night i woke up several times with an erection. I must have had sexy dreams that i didn't remember...
maybe i should try to sleep bound more often...
While She was getting ready to talk, She gave me some instructions in chat, first to mantra and edge and then to clean the kitchen sink. Once i was finished, She called and we began to shop.
She had already instructed me earlier to find shoes of a certain style that She liked and so i sent Her the links. I had also added another pair that i though would look great on Her sexy feet and She liked all of them.
So it didn't take long before She had decided and i ordered two pairs of shoes for Her.
We continued to talk and my beautiful Owner shared some photos with me that She hadn't published yet. Then She told me to stand up and walk up and down in my 6" heels while She instructed me how to walk and sway my hips. I don't have enough practice with walking in high-heels, so i was panting after a few minutes and She finally allowed me to sit down again. Next, She showed me how to moan like a girl and i followed Her example. Moaning together was fun and exciting!
Since my own birthday had only been a week before Her's, She asked if i wanted to buy something for myself, too. I had already expected that and sent Her the link to a cute latex mask that i had been considering. I had been unable to decide for one or two hair-pieces and the colors, so i asked for Her decision. She liked the version with two ponytails best and we both agreed that the colors like on the photo would look best with my maid uniform.
We continued to talk about my fetish clothing and the toys i have and i shared some photos with Her and soon our time was up.
She didn't let me go without some instructions. First i was allowed to use my fleshlight to edge 3 times while wearing nipple-clamps. I had to practice moaning while i edged and although it was a bit odd at first and i soon started to enjoy it.
Then i prepared for bedtime. Domina Shelle wanted me to sleep chained to my bed, so i chained my hands to the headboard. It was not the first time i had tried to sleep tied, but it had always excited me too much to be able to sleep. This time was no different, but unlike the other times, i didn't dare to disobey and untie myself. I finally fell asleep and during the night i woke up several times with an erection. I must have had sexy dreams that i didn't remember...
maybe i should try to sleep bound more often...
Permission to release
After 4 days of teasing with the stop-and-go game, i was so frustrated, that i had to ask Lady Helena for release. To my delight, i got Her permission and so i inserted a butt-plug and started to stroke to the first edge. I stopped like i was told to and repeated my mantra, then i was finally able release.
After all that frustration, it felt wonderful and i didn't mind licking my cum from the floor.
To my surprise, i was horny very soon again. I don't know whether this is from the teasing the days before or if there were some suggestions in Her file that caused it, but i was very happy not to have the 'post orgasm blues' like i have had before... thank You, Lady Helena!
After all that frustration, it felt wonderful and i didn't mind licking my cum from the floor.
To my surprise, i was horny very soon again. I don't know whether this is from the teasing the days before or if there were some suggestions in Her file that caused it, but i was very happy not to have the 'post orgasm blues' like i have had before... thank You, Lady Helena!
Intense teasing and denial
Lady Helena has released an amazing recording this week. Trigger of Insanity is teasing and denial at it's best! After a long induction, She installed two triggers in my slave-brain, ON and OFF.
With ON, She can turn on my arousal and cause my hand to stroke my cock, but with OFF, my hand falls to my side and my arousal fades away. I will even trigger myself with it if i should get too close to the edge...
Of course, She tested the triggers during the session and had me stop and go several times. I loved it and so i was eager to listen to the included loop-file immediately.
I soon understood why the session is called Trigger of Insanity... Lady Helena played the stop-and-go game for the whole 15 minutes of the loop, only allowing me to stroke for a few seconds, before telling me to stop again and within minutes, i was whimpering with sexual frustration.
The recording would require me to listen to the loop twice for three days, but Lady Helena had slightly different instructions for me. I will have to do four days, with four loops daily before i may ask Her for release...
I'm already so frustrated after the first day, that i can barely wait until Saturday, this will probably be the hardest period of orgasmdenial i have experienced so far...
With ON, She can turn on my arousal and cause my hand to stroke my cock, but with OFF, my hand falls to my side and my arousal fades away. I will even trigger myself with it if i should get too close to the edge...
Of course, She tested the triggers during the session and had me stop and go several times. I loved it and so i was eager to listen to the included loop-file immediately.
I soon understood why the session is called Trigger of Insanity... Lady Helena played the stop-and-go game for the whole 15 minutes of the loop, only allowing me to stroke for a few seconds, before telling me to stop again and within minutes, i was whimpering with sexual frustration.
The recording would require me to listen to the loop twice for three days, but Lady Helena had slightly different instructions for me. I will have to do four days, with four loops daily before i may ask Her for release...
I'm already so frustrated after the first day, that i can barely wait until Saturday, this will probably be the hardest period of orgasmdenial i have experienced so far...
Stricter chastity
Domina Shelle had extended my chastity assignment by 3 days after i had begged Her for it and She had instructed me to listen to Brain Fried each day. This is my absolute favorite of Her chastity files and the effects seem to get stronger with each time i listen.
I love being locked in Her hypnotic cock cage so much, that i begged Her for a stricter mode of chastity. So from now on, i'm only allowed to touch in a call with Her or Lady Helena or when i have earned it by doing my maid chores or pleasing my Owners in other ways.
And it's already showing first effects... i have been horny non-stop from the moment i read Her email yesterday and i was extra motivated to do my chores today.
I love being locked in Her hypnotic cock cage so much, that i begged Her for a stricter mode of chastity. So from now on, i'm only allowed to touch in a call with Her or Lady Helena or when i have earned it by doing my maid chores or pleasing my Owners in other ways.
And it's already showing first effects... i have been horny non-stop from the moment i read Her email yesterday and i was extra motivated to do my chores today.
Begging for chastity
I'm on day 8 of the Chastity Assignment and for some reason, it's harder than longer periods before. I guess it's due to the fact that Domina Shelle has been very generous with permissions to stroke and cum lately. I just got too used to that...
In an email i sent Her this morning, i had expressed the state i'm currently in. I'm not sure what i want more, to cum or to stay chaste, but i know, that i would probably regret cumming once the momentary pleasure has ended and my constant arousal is gone.
A few minutes ago, i received Her answer. Just a few words like 'you don't want to cum' and 'you will make the right decision' were enough and before i knew it, i had replied and begged Her to extend my chastity. When i pressed the 'Send' button, it was like waking up from a short trance. It felt like She somehow triggered me to do that.
I have never felt so controlled, but i love it!!!
In an email i sent Her this morning, i had expressed the state i'm currently in. I'm not sure what i want more, to cum or to stay chaste, but i know, that i would probably regret cumming once the momentary pleasure has ended and my constant arousal is gone.
A few minutes ago, i received Her answer. Just a few words like 'you don't want to cum' and 'you will make the right decision' were enough and before i knew it, i had replied and begged Her to extend my chastity. When i pressed the 'Send' button, it was like waking up from a short trance. It felt like She somehow triggered me to do that.
I have never felt so controlled, but i love it!!!
Chastity Assignment
Many of Domina Shelle's recent sessions gave me the opportunity to cum. Although i appreciated it and enjoyed those moments, i noticed how cumming too often has decreased my submissive feelings and so, i was happy to see Her release a new Chastity Assignment last weekend.
I had to wait until Monday to start, but each day, the waiting increased my anticipation. She gave the option to either go for 7 or 10 days and of course, i opted for the longer one.
The first two days have been without touching, just listening to two of Her chastity recordings each day. This was a very good start to get me into the mood again.
Today, on the third day, i was allowed some stroking, but only while doing my mantra and when it was required by the files i was instructed to listen to. And i was only allowed slow stroking and had to stay away from the edge...
That last part was very frustrating! I longed to stroke faster, to feel more pleasure and to enjoy an edge and without my Owner's control, i would have been too weak to resist this urge.
I had to wait until Monday to start, but each day, the waiting increased my anticipation. She gave the option to either go for 7 or 10 days and of course, i opted for the longer one.
The first two days have been without touching, just listening to two of Her chastity recordings each day. This was a very good start to get me into the mood again.
Today, on the third day, i was allowed some stroking, but only while doing my mantra and when it was required by the files i was instructed to listen to. And i was only allowed slow stroking and had to stay away from the edge...
That last part was very frustrating! I longed to stroke faster, to feel more pleasure and to enjoy an edge and without my Owner's control, i would have been too weak to resist this urge.
More maid training
I had a fun maid-training session with Domina Shelle tonight.
Like She instructed, i was waiting in my uniform and with a feather-duster until She called me. After a bit of initial chat, She sent me to dust everything in the living-room, while She kept talking. She first described how She would sit back and relax with a glass of wine while watching me work, but then started to take me into a light trance.
After a while, i thought that i'd found and removed all the dust and reported to my Owner. She had me take a while glove and test my work and of course, there was some dust left. This earned me the first punishment, a 10 minute caning from Lady Helena. I must confess, that i liked to hear that and i'm looking forward to my call with Lady Helena on Thursday.
Domina had me start all over and despite my efforts, the second check with the white glove still showed a little bit of dust. Domina sentenced me to another 10 minutes of caning and this time i started to get a bit worried. If Lady Helena is in a sadistic mood on Thursday, sitting down will be painful for several days afterwards.
But Domina Shelle wasn't finished yet. She told me to fetch a belt and hit my inner thighs with it. I hadn't noticed, how deep in trance i must have been at that point and how compliant Domina Shelle had made me, but when i spanked my thighs, i was just acting upon Her command without thinking about the pain that the impact would cause. And so, i didn't hold back and hit my thighs hard.
After having me insert a butt-plug, Domina sent me onto the third round of dusting and this time, i managed to pass the glove-test. She allowed me to stroke and edge and when i got close, She asked if i want to save my orgasm for Her. I had answered with "Yes, Domina!" over and over again while i was dusting and so i didn't think and just answered in the same way again.
Before finishing our call, Domina Shelle gave me with some assignments. I'll have to listen to Sissy Maid tonight (which has a lot of similarities to what we did tonight) and i will have to spend 3 hours cleaning my bathroom until the end of the week. She expects me to have everything clean enough, that i will lick and kiss the toilet without hesitation if She told me so.
Like She instructed, i was waiting in my uniform and with a feather-duster until She called me. After a bit of initial chat, She sent me to dust everything in the living-room, while She kept talking. She first described how She would sit back and relax with a glass of wine while watching me work, but then started to take me into a light trance.
After a while, i thought that i'd found and removed all the dust and reported to my Owner. She had me take a while glove and test my work and of course, there was some dust left. This earned me the first punishment, a 10 minute caning from Lady Helena. I must confess, that i liked to hear that and i'm looking forward to my call with Lady Helena on Thursday.
Domina had me start all over and despite my efforts, the second check with the white glove still showed a little bit of dust. Domina sentenced me to another 10 minutes of caning and this time i started to get a bit worried. If Lady Helena is in a sadistic mood on Thursday, sitting down will be painful for several days afterwards.
But Domina Shelle wasn't finished yet. She told me to fetch a belt and hit my inner thighs with it. I hadn't noticed, how deep in trance i must have been at that point and how compliant Domina Shelle had made me, but when i spanked my thighs, i was just acting upon Her command without thinking about the pain that the impact would cause. And so, i didn't hold back and hit my thighs hard.
After having me insert a butt-plug, Domina sent me onto the third round of dusting and this time, i managed to pass the glove-test. She allowed me to stroke and edge and when i got close, She asked if i want to save my orgasm for Her. I had answered with "Yes, Domina!" over and over again while i was dusting and so i didn't think and just answered in the same way again.
Before finishing our call, Domina Shelle gave me with some assignments. I'll have to listen to Sissy Maid tonight (which has a lot of similarities to what we did tonight) and i will have to spend 3 hours cleaning my bathroom until the end of the week. She expects me to have everything clean enough, that i will lick and kiss the toilet without hesitation if She told me so.
Maid Day
I had been looking forward to today since Domina Shelle surprised me with a sissy-maid assignment on Thursday.
So today, after taking a bath like She instructed, i got dressed while listening to Her Sissy Maid file. It had the desired effect to make me horny and connecting my arousal with doing my maid duties and so i was eager to start.
Dressed in my pink maid-uniform, with my highest heels and wearing a butt-plug, i started to clean the bathroom and then the kitchen. Before long, i was sweating heavily due to the weather and the adhesive breast-forms tugged painfully on my still sore nipples, but i knew, that Domina Shelle would not accept sloppy work. She had instructed me to send before and after pictures and since i had already cleaned earlier this week, i had to put extra attention to the details, so that the pictures would show a visible improvement.
After almost 4 hours, i was finished and happy to get out of my maid-uniform. Following my instructions, i took another bath and sent Her my report afterwards, before putting my feet up for the rest of the afternoon...
So today, after taking a bath like She instructed, i got dressed while listening to Her Sissy Maid file. It had the desired effect to make me horny and connecting my arousal with doing my maid duties and so i was eager to start.
Dressed in my pink maid-uniform, with my highest heels and wearing a butt-plug, i started to clean the bathroom and then the kitchen. Before long, i was sweating heavily due to the weather and the adhesive breast-forms tugged painfully on my still sore nipples, but i knew, that Domina Shelle would not accept sloppy work. She had instructed me to send before and after pictures and since i had already cleaned earlier this week, i had to put extra attention to the details, so that the pictures would show a visible improvement.
After almost 4 hours, i was finished and happy to get out of my maid-uniform. Following my instructions, i took another bath and sent Her my report afterwards, before putting my feet up for the rest of the afternoon...
Nipple torture
Lady Helena is really keeping me busy with assignments. After having edged 13 times last weekend, She used that number to torture me this week. Starting on Tuesday, i had to wear nipple-clamps for 13 hours and a butt-plug for the same amount of time until Sunday evening.
The butt-plug would be no problem, but i know, that with my nipples still being sore from the last assignment, this part would become hard.
I decided to divide the hours evenly over the six days. The first day was fun, i divided the time into four sessions with a little break in between. Each of them got a little harder, since the soreness accumulated, but i had no problem standing it.
Wednesday was already more difficult, but i stuck to that pattern and was able to do the planned same of time.
The problems started on Thursday. My nipples were still so sore, that they hurt badly from the first moment i put the clamps on and i was not able to wear them for more than 15 minutes at a time. In the end, i ended with 30 minutes less than planned, that i would somehow have to catch up.
I had to take a break on Friday since even touching my nipples hurt.
Today was a bit better. I had more time to do my assignment with shorter intervals distributed over the day, but the soreness built up quickly again. I managed to reach the duration i had planned for, but was unable to catch up with the 160 minutes i was behind.
I still have the Sunday, but Domina Shelle has given me a maid assignment that will keep me busy and i think i will not be able to stand wearing the nipple-clamps under the breast-forms.
I will try my best, but i'm not very optimistic that i can reach more than 10 hours. I'm going to have to confess my failure and beg for punishment...
The butt-plug would be no problem, but i know, that with my nipples still being sore from the last assignment, this part would become hard.
I decided to divide the hours evenly over the six days. The first day was fun, i divided the time into four sessions with a little break in between. Each of them got a little harder, since the soreness accumulated, but i had no problem standing it.
Wednesday was already more difficult, but i stuck to that pattern and was able to do the planned same of time.
The problems started on Thursday. My nipples were still so sore, that they hurt badly from the first moment i put the clamps on and i was not able to wear them for more than 15 minutes at a time. In the end, i ended with 30 minutes less than planned, that i would somehow have to catch up.
I had to take a break on Friday since even touching my nipples hurt.
Today was a bit better. I had more time to do my assignment with shorter intervals distributed over the day, but the soreness built up quickly again. I managed to reach the duration i had planned for, but was unable to catch up with the 160 minutes i was behind.
I still have the Sunday, but Domina Shelle has given me a maid assignment that will keep me busy and i think i will not be able to stand wearing the nipple-clamps under the breast-forms.
I will try my best, but i'm not very optimistic that i can reach more than 10 hours. I'm going to have to confess my failure and beg for punishment...
Kept busy
Domina Shelle and Lady Helena kept me pretty busy this weekend...
When i woke up on Thursday, i had an email from Lady Helena with a new assignment. I was to edge as often as possible until Sunday evening and besides that, She told me to wear nipple-clamps for one hour each day and listen to Don't Think.
I had planned to start as soon as i returned home from work and spent the rest of the evening with edging, but in the afternoon, i got an assignment from Domina Shelle, too. She wanted me to refresh my Playground Triggers over the weekend. Besides listening to the introduction session each day, She assigned me three trigger files to listen to on Friday and Saturday.
After listening to Lady Helena's file, it put clothespins onto my nipples. They weren't painful at first, but i knew this would change. I stroked and edged two times before my nipples started to burn and the pain got too distracting. There were still 15 minutes left and i tried to keep myself horny enough, so taking the clamps off would suck less. I removed the clothespins very carefully and the pain was bearable, but my nipples stayed sore for quite a while afterwards.
On Friday morning, i had another email from Domina Shelle. She had sent me six free files with brain-chip updates, how generous of Her! I was curios about the files, but decided to wait until i had finished my assignments.
However, i couldn't wait to listen when i read the description of the new file, that Domina Shelle released on Saturday. The description of Re-Form School sounded so hot, that i couldn't resist. My memories of the session are a bit blurred, so i need to listen again before i can tell about details, but i remember that it was indeed very sexy, but also a lesson in female superiority.
I spent most of the weekend with stroking and listening to sessions. At times, it felt like i didn't even wake up completely between sessions and in the end, the weekend was over in the blink of an eye. I wrote an emails to my Owners, reporting my assignments done and hoping that Lady Helena would be pleased with the 13 edges i did.
Both have allowed me to cum, but Lady Helena has already a new assignment for me. This week, for my 13 edges, i'll have to accumulate 13 hours of wearing nipple-clamps and also of wearing a butt-plug. With 6 days left, that's more than 2 hours a day, with my nipples still being a bit sore, this won't be an easy assignment...
When i woke up on Thursday, i had an email from Lady Helena with a new assignment. I was to edge as often as possible until Sunday evening and besides that, She told me to wear nipple-clamps for one hour each day and listen to Don't Think.
I had planned to start as soon as i returned home from work and spent the rest of the evening with edging, but in the afternoon, i got an assignment from Domina Shelle, too. She wanted me to refresh my Playground Triggers over the weekend. Besides listening to the introduction session each day, She assigned me three trigger files to listen to on Friday and Saturday.
After listening to Lady Helena's file, it put clothespins onto my nipples. They weren't painful at first, but i knew this would change. I stroked and edged two times before my nipples started to burn and the pain got too distracting. There were still 15 minutes left and i tried to keep myself horny enough, so taking the clamps off would suck less. I removed the clothespins very carefully and the pain was bearable, but my nipples stayed sore for quite a while afterwards.
On Friday morning, i had another email from Domina Shelle. She had sent me six free files with brain-chip updates, how generous of Her! I was curios about the files, but decided to wait until i had finished my assignments.
However, i couldn't wait to listen when i read the description of the new file, that Domina Shelle released on Saturday. The description of Re-Form School sounded so hot, that i couldn't resist. My memories of the session are a bit blurred, so i need to listen again before i can tell about details, but i remember that it was indeed very sexy, but also a lesson in female superiority.
I spent most of the weekend with stroking and listening to sessions. At times, it felt like i didn't even wake up completely between sessions and in the end, the weekend was over in the blink of an eye. I wrote an emails to my Owners, reporting my assignments done and hoping that Lady Helena would be pleased with the 13 edges i did.
Both have allowed me to cum, but Lady Helena has already a new assignment for me. This week, for my 13 edges, i'll have to accumulate 13 hours of wearing nipple-clamps and also of wearing a butt-plug. With 6 days left, that's more than 2 hours a day, with my nipples still being a bit sore, this won't be an easy assignment...
Don't think
Lady Helena has released a new recording yesterday. Don't think is an impressive demonstration of Her skills as a hypnotist. She didn't waste any time after the session started an had me in a deep hypnotic sleep within a few minutes. She didn't stop there and continued to count me deeper and deeper and then deeper again until my thoughts were completely turned off.
It felt amazing not to think and only enjoy Her soothing voice and the arousal She created within me.
Before waking me up, She implanted a powerful trigger that allows Her to take me back into this state.
I felt the urge to touch my cock grow while She counted me up. But the recording didn't end, Lady Helena continued to talk and turn me on and when She used the new trigger, i felt like i was being knocked over and fell back into a mindless state.
She continued to tease me before waking me up horny and denied...
It felt amazing not to think and only enjoy Her soothing voice and the arousal She created within me.
Before waking me up, She implanted a powerful trigger that allows Her to take me back into this state.
I felt the urge to touch my cock grow while She counted me up. But the recording didn't end, Lady Helena continued to talk and turn me on and when She used the new trigger, i felt like i was being knocked over and fell back into a mindless state.
She continued to tease me before waking me up horny and denied...
Chastity surprise
I had an amazing Skype session with both my Owners today. We hadn't talked about what Domina Shelle and Lady Helena would do with me, so i got a little nervous as the appointed time approached.
The nervousness was quickly gone once we were talking and it didn't take long until Domina Shelle started to take me into trance. After a while, Lady Helena chimed in and started to tease me. First by talking about Her own arousal, but then She told me to rub my sissy clitty.
I was already getting the impression that i would get permission to cum when Domina suddenly put me into hypnotic chastity. She used the trigger word 'caged' to lock my desire to cum away. For a very long time, She said.
Lady Helena challenged Her suggestions by teasing me even more, but the physical part of my arousal was gone. While waking me up, they both teased me about how desperate they will make me and i'm really looking forward to that.
Before finishing our session, Lady Helena administered a couple of cane strokes with my spanking machine. I think She set it to a higher level than last time, it was just right to make me nervous about the next stroke and moan from the pain. It was not easy to take without a warm up, but hearing my Owners giggle and the nice afterglow i feel now, made it worth the suffering.
The nervousness was quickly gone once we were talking and it didn't take long until Domina Shelle started to take me into trance. After a while, Lady Helena chimed in and started to tease me. First by talking about Her own arousal, but then She told me to rub my sissy clitty.
I was already getting the impression that i would get permission to cum when Domina suddenly put me into hypnotic chastity. She used the trigger word 'caged' to lock my desire to cum away. For a very long time, She said.
Lady Helena challenged Her suggestions by teasing me even more, but the physical part of my arousal was gone. While waking me up, they both teased me about how desperate they will make me and i'm really looking forward to that.
Before finishing our session, Lady Helena administered a couple of cane strokes with my spanking machine. I think She set it to a higher level than last time, it was just right to make me nervous about the next stroke and moan from the pain. It was not easy to take without a warm up, but hearing my Owners giggle and the nice afterglow i feel now, made it worth the suffering.
Boot camp: graduation
I made it through Lady Helena's boot-camp and earned the privilege to be contracted and collared by Her. Tonight we had the collaring ceremony.
First, She told me to recite the mantras of all four weeks. I had expected that and had made an effort to learn them by heart. I didn't want to make the same mistake like in the first week. I made a few minor mistakes for which i will get a spanking later, but Lady Helena was satisfied and allowed me to stroke slowly while She took me into a light trance.
She told me to repeat after Her... sentences about serving Domina Shelle and Her forever, obeying them and make every effort to make their lives easier. She also wanted me to tell Her what i have learned in the last four weeks and how i felt about that.
Lady Helena had told me that i would be allowed to cum, but while i was stroking slowly, i didn't feel like i would be able to edge. Only when She told me, to get closer, i did and i came exactly when She instructed me to. I didn't feel like i had much control over it and this made it feel very special.
I proud to be accepted as Lady Helena's contracted slave. I now, that serving two superiors will require more dedication from me, but i'm also looking forward to experience the control of two powerful women.
First, She told me to recite the mantras of all four weeks. I had expected that and had made an effort to learn them by heart. I didn't want to make the same mistake like in the first week. I made a few minor mistakes for which i will get a spanking later, but Lady Helena was satisfied and allowed me to stroke slowly while She took me into a light trance.
She told me to repeat after Her... sentences about serving Domina Shelle and Her forever, obeying them and make every effort to make their lives easier. She also wanted me to tell Her what i have learned in the last four weeks and how i felt about that.
Lady Helena had told me that i would be allowed to cum, but while i was stroking slowly, i didn't feel like i would be able to edge. Only when She told me, to get closer, i did and i came exactly when She instructed me to. I didn't feel like i had much control over it and this made it feel very special.
I proud to be accepted as Lady Helena's contracted slave. I now, that serving two superiors will require more dedication from me, but i'm also looking forward to experience the control of two powerful women.
Boot camp: final week
The final week of Lady Helena's bootcamp has started. When i read the instructions, my first impression was that it wouldn't be much different to last week. I'm allowed red meat again, only fried food and ice-cream (which would be awesome to have, considering the weather) are still forbidden.
Things changed when i listened to this week's instruction file in the evening and i learned that this week my challenge will be to edge as often as possible. For the first day, it was limited to once per hour, so i only edged 3 times, but the next days will be a lot harder...
Things changed when i listened to this week's instruction file in the evening and i learned that this week my challenge will be to edge as often as possible. For the first day, it was limited to once per hour, so i only edged 3 times, but the next days will be a lot harder...
Boot-camp: week 3
I'm now in the middle of week 3 of Lady Helena's boot-camp. For making it through the first two weeks, i have earned the title 'private' and i'm allowed to drink coffee again. Great news for me!
The routine stays similar to the first two weeks. Diet, exercise and listening to daily session will keep me busy.
I think i have used the permission to edge a little too much last week, because my stroking is restricted again to 5 minutes a day and the first two days have been a bit frustrating.
Before i went to bed on Monday, i got an assignment from Commander Helena. It was already too late to start with it, so i had to wait until Tuesday evening.
After putting nipple-clamps on, i started with the assignment. First i had to write down my workout mantra 10 times. Fortunately i'm fast at typing, so it took me only 10 minutes, but my nipples started to hurt when i was finished. The next instruction was to put two ice-cubes up my ass and continue writing until they had melted. I don't like the cold in my ass and how it feels when they melt, but the worst was to come next.
15 slaps on my balls and after each, i had to write a sentence. The writing break made sure that the pain could sink in and i couldn't rush through it. I hate hitting my balls, but Commander Helena likes it and knowing that helps me to hit even harder...
After pushing a butt-plug in and out a couple of times, more ice-cubes went in and i was back to typing the mantra while they melted.
After around 45 minutes, i was finally finished and allowed to take off the nipple-clamps. I had underestimated how long the assignment would take or else, i would have chosen weaker clamps. The hurt a lot when they came off and my nipples were sore for quite some time afterwards.
I have a feeling that there will be more assignments like this... after all, Lady Helena calls it the 'hell week'...
The routine stays similar to the first two weeks. Diet, exercise and listening to daily session will keep me busy.
I think i have used the permission to edge a little too much last week, because my stroking is restricted again to 5 minutes a day and the first two days have been a bit frustrating.
Before i went to bed on Monday, i got an assignment from Commander Helena. It was already too late to start with it, so i had to wait until Tuesday evening.
After putting nipple-clamps on, i started with the assignment. First i had to write down my workout mantra 10 times. Fortunately i'm fast at typing, so it took me only 10 minutes, but my nipples started to hurt when i was finished. The next instruction was to put two ice-cubes up my ass and continue writing until they had melted. I don't like the cold in my ass and how it feels when they melt, but the worst was to come next.
15 slaps on my balls and after each, i had to write a sentence. The writing break made sure that the pain could sink in and i couldn't rush through it. I hate hitting my balls, but Commander Helena likes it and knowing that helps me to hit even harder...
After pushing a butt-plug in and out a couple of times, more ice-cubes went in and i was back to typing the mantra while they melted.
After around 45 minutes, i was finally finished and allowed to take off the nipple-clamps. I had underestimated how long the assignment would take or else, i would have chosen weaker clamps. The hurt a lot when they came off and my nipples were sore for quite some time afterwards.
I have a feeling that there will be more assignments like this... after all, Lady Helena calls it the 'hell week'...
Boot camp: week 2 ahead
Today is the last day of week 1 of Lady Helena's boot camp and it took more willpower to go through with it than i had expected. Especially the dietary restrictions have been hard for me. Having no coffee in the morning was hell and i could only stand it because i didn't have to work this week. Luckily, Lady Helena has allowed me to drink a cup of coffee when i absolutely need it, so my work doesn't suffer.
She had given Her recruits the chance for a short teasing session on Thursday and i happily accepted the offer. I had been looking forward to be allowed some stroking, but when i received the order to have a wooden spoon at hand shortly before the appointed time, i knew, that She had other plans. My hope was that She would tell me to spank my ass, that would have been fun, but when She told me to recite this week's mantra, i knew i was doomed. I had chanted it every morning and evening, but i had read it from a print-out, because i'm not good at memorizing such things. I got nervous and failed to recite even the first line.
As a punishment, She had me hit my balls 30 times with the spoon. It's surprising, how much harder i can make myself hit when She guides me and so my balls began to hurt after a few strokes. Instinctively, i put a little less strength into the smacks, but Lady Helena must noticed that by the noise or because i was whimpering less and She told me to hit harder whenever i tried to reduce strength.
I was relieved when the set of 30 was over... and horrified when Lady Helena demanded 5 more extra hard strokes... how long would this continue...?
Luckily, it ended after those 5. I will make sure, that i know the mantra next time we talk...
We chatted a bit before saying goodbye and i might have made the next mistake there... I told Lady Helena how i had used my spanking-machine on myself the week before. I had been so enveloped in enjoying the pain, that i overdid it a bit and only noticed that my skin broke when i felt blood dripping onto my foot. It hurt a lot for several days and again i was lucky to have the week off. Sitting at my desk would have sucked with my sore ass.
"You are a pain slut, I love that!" was Lady Helena's reaction. She's right, i am a pain slut, but only for certain kinds of pain like spanking or nipple torture. Hitting my balls is not on that list!
Next week's instructions are similar to this week. I'm allowed red meat or something sweet on one day of my choice (Yay!) and the time for wearing nipple clamps and a buttplug will ramp up to one hours. But Lady Helena decided, that since i'm a pain slut, this might be too easy for me and She will send me additional instructions. I'm not quite sure if i like that or not, it depends on the pain She chooses to inflict and i have a strong suspicion, that my balls will be involved...
She had given Her recruits the chance for a short teasing session on Thursday and i happily accepted the offer. I had been looking forward to be allowed some stroking, but when i received the order to have a wooden spoon at hand shortly before the appointed time, i knew, that She had other plans. My hope was that She would tell me to spank my ass, that would have been fun, but when She told me to recite this week's mantra, i knew i was doomed. I had chanted it every morning and evening, but i had read it from a print-out, because i'm not good at memorizing such things. I got nervous and failed to recite even the first line.
As a punishment, She had me hit my balls 30 times with the spoon. It's surprising, how much harder i can make myself hit when She guides me and so my balls began to hurt after a few strokes. Instinctively, i put a little less strength into the smacks, but Lady Helena must noticed that by the noise or because i was whimpering less and She told me to hit harder whenever i tried to reduce strength.
I was relieved when the set of 30 was over... and horrified when Lady Helena demanded 5 more extra hard strokes... how long would this continue...?
Luckily, it ended after those 5. I will make sure, that i know the mantra next time we talk...
We chatted a bit before saying goodbye and i might have made the next mistake there... I told Lady Helena how i had used my spanking-machine on myself the week before. I had been so enveloped in enjoying the pain, that i overdid it a bit and only noticed that my skin broke when i felt blood dripping onto my foot. It hurt a lot for several days and again i was lucky to have the week off. Sitting at my desk would have sucked with my sore ass.
"You are a pain slut, I love that!" was Lady Helena's reaction. She's right, i am a pain slut, but only for certain kinds of pain like spanking or nipple torture. Hitting my balls is not on that list!
Next week's instructions are similar to this week. I'm allowed red meat or something sweet on one day of my choice (Yay!) and the time for wearing nipple clamps and a buttplug will ramp up to one hours. But Lady Helena decided, that since i'm a pain slut, this might be too easy for me and She will send me additional instructions. I'm not quite sure if i like that or not, it depends on the pain She chooses to inflict and i have a strong suspicion, that my balls will be involved...
Boot Camp
Lady Helena's bootcamp has started! When i awoke this morning, i found Her email with instructions and a set of files for the first of four weeks. My morning and evening routine will now include an additional mantra for Her, besides that i do for my Owner and after that, an exercise routine is required. It is accompanied by a recording where Lady Helena guides me through them, which makes it a lot easier for me to go through with it.
The next impact on my daily routine are the dietary commands that i'll have to stick to. Some of them are easy to follow, but being denied of coffee and cheese, two of my favorite food products will be very hard.
Right after lunch, i continued by listening to the files that are to be listened to as often as possible during this first week. More instructions were awaiting me... from now on, there will be no 'i' or 'me' when i communicate with my commander, Lady Helena, but i will have to use 'this recruit' and 'it'. I feel slightly humiliated by it, but it's also hot...
I wasn't very surprised to be denied masturbation for the first week, in fact, i was looking forward to that.
The instructions for the first two days are not too difficult (aside from the lack of caffeine). There will be additional instructions afterwards that i'm actually looking forward to, but this is only the first week and things might get much more difficult...
The next impact on my daily routine are the dietary commands that i'll have to stick to. Some of them are easy to follow, but being denied of coffee and cheese, two of my favorite food products will be very hard.
Right after lunch, i continued by listening to the files that are to be listened to as often as possible during this first week. More instructions were awaiting me... from now on, there will be no 'i' or 'me' when i communicate with my commander, Lady Helena, but i will have to use 'this recruit' and 'it'. I feel slightly humiliated by it, but it's also hot...
I wasn't very surprised to be denied masturbation for the first week, in fact, i was looking forward to that.
The instructions for the first two days are not too difficult (aside from the lack of caffeine). There will be additional instructions afterwards that i'm actually looking forward to, but this is only the first week and things might get much more difficult...
Sissy maid training
Domina Shelle released two new recordings this weekend and both of them blew me away! The first one is called Chemical Sedation. It starts with a very soothing induction that quickly took me into a deep trance. Then Domina begins to create a fantasy where She is the sexy nurse who sedates me with a new special drug. I could feel, how it made my body heavy and paralyzed before creating a burning arousal inside me. It wasn't Domina Shelle if this file hadn't also contained a deeper conditioning. While allowing me to stroke my cock, She conditioned my mind to always connect Her voice to the effects of the drug. Before reinforcing the suggestions by allowing me release, She also installed a post hypnotic suggestion that introduces a new level of orgasm control.
From now on, i may only ask for release on the first of each month and She will only grant it if i have been a good sissy girl. This will certainly be a huge motivation to always please Her, especially with the after effects of this session, because only a few hours later, i was already horny again like after an extended denial...
The second session is called Sissy Maid. The name already says what it is about... after first cleaning my mind, Domina installed a new trigger inside my brain that creates a need to clean while wearing a butt-plug. It was no surprise that She used that trigger right away and i found myself inserting a big plug before spending the next 2 hours with cleaning. The more i cleaned, the hornier i got and the time passed quickly...
With the combination of these files, Domina Shelle has created a powerful tool to keep me hard working and eager to please Her...
From now on, i may only ask for release on the first of each month and She will only grant it if i have been a good sissy girl. This will certainly be a huge motivation to always please Her, especially with the after effects of this session, because only a few hours later, i was already horny again like after an extended denial...
The second session is called Sissy Maid. The name already says what it is about... after first cleaning my mind, Domina installed a new trigger inside my brain that creates a need to clean while wearing a butt-plug. It was no surprise that She used that trigger right away and i found myself inserting a big plug before spending the next 2 hours with cleaning. The more i cleaned, the hornier i got and the time passed quickly...
With the combination of these files, Domina Shelle has created a powerful tool to keep me hard working and eager to please Her...
I lost the chastity challenge
Lady Helena really likes to torture me with the Icy Hot... When i checked my emails this morning, i found Her instruction to put some on my ass hole and think of Her for 3 hours.
I was looking forward to do that for the whole day and as soon as i returned home in the evening, i applied it. Within a few seconds, it was burning so much, that i wanted it to stop. I had experienced the same sensation during our last session and i had been able to endure it, but without Lady Helena's voice, it was more difficult. After a few minutes, the burning faded into a warm feeling which made me really horny.
I was lucky, that it was Thursday, so i was allowed to stroke and that is what i did. Unfortunately the Icy Hot cause me to get a bit distracted and i didn't pay enough attention on edging. I failed to stop in time and came accidentally... i have lost the chastity competition with Lady Helena after 2 months...
I hate losing this way, i could have gone longer...
I was looking forward to do that for the whole day and as soon as i returned home in the evening, i applied it. Within a few seconds, it was burning so much, that i wanted it to stop. I had experienced the same sensation during our last session and i had been able to endure it, but without Lady Helena's voice, it was more difficult. After a few minutes, the burning faded into a warm feeling which made me really horny.
I was lucky, that it was Thursday, so i was allowed to stroke and that is what i did. Unfortunately the Icy Hot cause me to get a bit distracted and i didn't pay enough attention on edging. I failed to stop in time and came accidentally... i have lost the chastity competition with Lady Helena after 2 months...
I hate losing this way, i could have gone longer...
Taught to say YES
Domina's latest file Malleable Mind is having a profound effect on me. It works in an indirect way, that shows me, that She doesn't need direct commands to control me. She just places ideas into my mind and they become reality. She suggested that my nipples would itch and i would have to pinch them to make it go away and it happened. She suggested that i might dream of Her and two nights ago She visited me in my dreams and tortured my nipples.
I had difficulties to describe the effects Her last few recordings had, but now it all comes together and makes perfect sense!
Last week, Lady Helena had asked me, when we would play again and of course i was more than eager to do so. Although i had already been punished by my Owner for being a lazy maid, i confessed to Lady Helena, too and asked for an additional punishment. Last night, time for punishment had come...
She had ordered me to wait in my maid-uniform, without panties and to prepare dry rice and Icy Hot besides having my spanking-machine set up. She had me wait a bit until She called, giving me time to get nervous...
After some initial small-talk, She told me to kneel down on the rice and started to teach me an important lesson: to always say 'Yes' to Her questions...
The first questions were easy. "Will you always obey me?" "Do you worship the ground i walk on" and so on. Once i was answering automatically, She asked "Will you put Icy Hot on your balls and sissy-hole?"
I had no choice but to get myself into trouble and answer with "Yes". It was the first time for me to experience Icy Hot and i didn't know what to expect. It started to burn a bit around my butt-hole but i didn't feel much on my balls. I was almost a little disappointed with the effect, but then it started. The burning grew stronger and i was in real discomfort, to a level where i almost thought i couldn't take it.
Lady Helena had me stroke, with my fingers still coated with the Icy Hot, and the questioning continued. Some easy to answer questions first, then "Do you want to be spanked?"
"Yes!" i had waited for that... a moment later the cane hit my ass, causing me to groan. The impact hurt, but i enjoyed the afterglow. Lady Helena continued to ask questions, sometimes spanking me after having asked, other times surprising me with it. The burning of the Icy Hot was just starting to fade a bit, when Her question hit me:
"Will you apply more Icy Hot?"
I didn't want to and my "Yes" was mixed with a bit of whining. I heard Lady Helena giggle. She was having fun and that motivated me to go on. I applied more Icy Hot and the burning started again, even a bit stronger than before. I was starting to sweat, next time i would beg for mercy...
More questions came and more cane strokes. I was starting to enjoy myself again.
"Will you apply more Icy Hot..." Oh no!!! "... to your nipples"
Although i didn't want more burning and i didn't know how it would feel on my nipples, my answer was "Yes" and i did like i was told. I was relived to find out that the effect wasn't very strong.
Lady Helena continued the game, questions, cane-strokes, some of them anticipated, others were a surprise. Our time passed quickly and without applying more Icy Hot and soon i was allowed to stand up.
I hadn't noticed how much my knees hurt with the rice digging into them and i felt a little stiff. Like after most of our sessions, i was still not completely back to earth when we said good-bye. I don't know, why i'm always so nervous before a session, because in the end, it's always great fun. I'm already looking forward to the next time, Lady Helena already has a plan...
I had difficulties to describe the effects Her last few recordings had, but now it all comes together and makes perfect sense!
Last week, Lady Helena had asked me, when we would play again and of course i was more than eager to do so. Although i had already been punished by my Owner for being a lazy maid, i confessed to Lady Helena, too and asked for an additional punishment. Last night, time for punishment had come...
She had ordered me to wait in my maid-uniform, without panties and to prepare dry rice and Icy Hot besides having my spanking-machine set up. She had me wait a bit until She called, giving me time to get nervous...
After some initial small-talk, She told me to kneel down on the rice and started to teach me an important lesson: to always say 'Yes' to Her questions...
The first questions were easy. "Will you always obey me?" "Do you worship the ground i walk on" and so on. Once i was answering automatically, She asked "Will you put Icy Hot on your balls and sissy-hole?"
I had no choice but to get myself into trouble and answer with "Yes". It was the first time for me to experience Icy Hot and i didn't know what to expect. It started to burn a bit around my butt-hole but i didn't feel much on my balls. I was almost a little disappointed with the effect, but then it started. The burning grew stronger and i was in real discomfort, to a level where i almost thought i couldn't take it.
Lady Helena had me stroke, with my fingers still coated with the Icy Hot, and the questioning continued. Some easy to answer questions first, then "Do you want to be spanked?"
"Yes!" i had waited for that... a moment later the cane hit my ass, causing me to groan. The impact hurt, but i enjoyed the afterglow. Lady Helena continued to ask questions, sometimes spanking me after having asked, other times surprising me with it. The burning of the Icy Hot was just starting to fade a bit, when Her question hit me:
"Will you apply more Icy Hot?"
I didn't want to and my "Yes" was mixed with a bit of whining. I heard Lady Helena giggle. She was having fun and that motivated me to go on. I applied more Icy Hot and the burning started again, even a bit stronger than before. I was starting to sweat, next time i would beg for mercy...
More questions came and more cane strokes. I was starting to enjoy myself again.
"Will you apply more Icy Hot..." Oh no!!! "... to your nipples"
Although i didn't want more burning and i didn't know how it would feel on my nipples, my answer was "Yes" and i did like i was told. I was relived to find out that the effect wasn't very strong.
Lady Helena continued the game, questions, cane-strokes, some of them anticipated, others were a surprise. Our time passed quickly and without applying more Icy Hot and soon i was allowed to stand up.
I hadn't noticed how much my knees hurt with the rice digging into them and i felt a little stiff. Like after most of our sessions, i was still not completely back to earth when we said good-bye. I don't know, why i'm always so nervous before a session, because in the end, it's always great fun. I'm already looking forward to the next time, Lady Helena already has a plan...
Punished for being lazy
I have been a bit lazy with my maid duties and my office wasn't tidy enough when i reported last Sunday. I realized that i needed to be brought back to track and asked Domina Shelle for a punishment. She replied yesterday and instructed me to clean my bathroom with a toothbrush.
This morning, i dressed into my pink maid uniform, 6" heels and a blond wig, did my makeup and started to work. The heels and the petticoat made moving around a little challenging and slowed me down even more than using the toothbrush already did.
It took me a lot of time to clean and i had time to reflect on my laziness. I want to be a good maid, not a lazy one, but sometimes i slip back to old habits and procrastinate instead of doing my chores. Punishment helps me to stay motivated, but i also want to become a better maid for my Owner, so i asked Her about a custom maid training session and an accompanying loop file that i can listen to while i do my chores. I'm looking forward to hear Her opinion, i'm sure that She will find a way to condition me to become Her perfect maid.
She currently has a 2-for-1 spring sale on Her website, so i browsed through Her files and found that i only had the first part of Her Femme series. I bought the 2nd part and asked Her for part 3...
Before listening to the new file, i also revisited part one. The files will help me to accept my fetishes and my inner female. I felt very good after waking up, comfortable with letting my female self come out whenever i'm alone and wanting to be her. I'm looking forward to receive part 3...
My chastity challenge with Lady Helena is getting more difficult... on Thursday, i was so desperate to stroke, that i used up my time already before getting up in the morning. I regretted that in the evening, because the urge was so strong, that i could barely keep my hands off my cock. The following days were not better, i really hope, that i will be able to calm myself down again to make to next days more bearable. I don't want to give up so soon...
This morning, i dressed into my pink maid uniform, 6" heels and a blond wig, did my makeup and started to work. The heels and the petticoat made moving around a little challenging and slowed me down even more than using the toothbrush already did.
It took me a lot of time to clean and i had time to reflect on my laziness. I want to be a good maid, not a lazy one, but sometimes i slip back to old habits and procrastinate instead of doing my chores. Punishment helps me to stay motivated, but i also want to become a better maid for my Owner, so i asked Her about a custom maid training session and an accompanying loop file that i can listen to while i do my chores. I'm looking forward to hear Her opinion, i'm sure that She will find a way to condition me to become Her perfect maid.
She currently has a 2-for-1 spring sale on Her website, so i browsed through Her files and found that i only had the first part of Her Femme series. I bought the 2nd part and asked Her for part 3...
Before listening to the new file, i also revisited part one. The files will help me to accept my fetishes and my inner female. I felt very good after waking up, comfortable with letting my female self come out whenever i'm alone and wanting to be her. I'm looking forward to receive part 3...
My chastity challenge with Lady Helena is getting more difficult... on Thursday, i was so desperate to stroke, that i used up my time already before getting up in the morning. I regretted that in the evening, because the urge was so strong, that i could barely keep my hands off my cock. The following days were not better, i really hope, that i will be able to calm myself down again to make to next days more bearable. I don't want to give up so soon...
Chastity Challenge: 5 weeks
The 5th week of the chastity challenge vs. Lady Helena is over and it starts to get a little harder for me. I have gone longer without touching before and a lot longer with frequent edging, but stroking only once per week is just enough to keep me from getting used to stay chaste. I'm almost a little angry at myself for suggesting this... but i'm not ready to give up yet, maybe i'll manage to get used to it a little more...
Domina and i are planning a whole evening of maid training. First She will supervise me via chat while i do my chores and later and later, before She sends me to bed, we will have a call where i might get punished for sloppy work or She'll train me in sucking a strapon... we are still working out the details and maybe Lady Helena will join us, too. This will be a lot of fun, although i'm sure that i'll be pretty exhausted afterwards...
Domina and i are planning a whole evening of maid training. First She will supervise me via chat while i do my chores and later and later, before She sends me to bed, we will have a call where i might get punished for sloppy work or She'll train me in sucking a strapon... we are still working out the details and maybe Lady Helena will join us, too. This will be a lot of fun, although i'm sure that i'll be pretty exhausted afterwards...
Suffering for Lady Helena's amusement
I'm still doing well with the chastity challenge and the past week was not too difficult. But Lady Helena said, that She is getting used to it, too, so there's no end in sight, yet...
After having to postpone it last week, we took my new spanking-machine to a test-drive last night.
After chatting a bit, we were ready to start and Lady Helena told me, that this would be an important lesson, because She would tech me to love to endure pain for Her (even more than i already did). She took me into a light trance and made me repeat sentences like 'i love to suffer for Your amusement' before the training started with putting some clothespins on my nipples and balls.
To my surprise, She allowed me to stroke despite our chastity challenge, but it came with a catch. She had me use a hot lube... i didn't have Icy Hot like She would have preferred me to use, but it still burned a bit and took away some of the pleasure from stroking.
The i heard the motor of the spanking-machine arm it... i waited for the impact, but it didn't come. Not yet... the devious thing about the machine is, that it doesn't strike immediately, but there's a separate button for that. And contrary to the motor being a little loud, the stroke itself is almost silent. There's a little noise from the arm moving, the swish of the cane and that's it. It all happens so fast, that i'm unable to prepare myself for the impact. So my moans of pain where mixed with yelps from the surprise. It was quite a mind-fuck for me and big fun for Lady Helena!
The new spanking-machine combined with the Delrin rod was a full success. The thin rod delivers a strong sting, while its weight makes sure, that there is also a thud like from a heavy cane and it raises the same red welts. I didn't count the strokes, it might have been a dozen or a little more, but if i'd had the choice, i would have stopped earlier. But i knew, how much fun it was for Lady Helena and that made me endure it. She always manages to push me just a little further every time.
After having to postpone it last week, we took my new spanking-machine to a test-drive last night.
After chatting a bit, we were ready to start and Lady Helena told me, that this would be an important lesson, because She would tech me to love to endure pain for Her (even more than i already did). She took me into a light trance and made me repeat sentences like 'i love to suffer for Your amusement' before the training started with putting some clothespins on my nipples and balls.
To my surprise, She allowed me to stroke despite our chastity challenge, but it came with a catch. She had me use a hot lube... i didn't have Icy Hot like She would have preferred me to use, but it still burned a bit and took away some of the pleasure from stroking.
The i heard the motor of the spanking-machine arm it... i waited for the impact, but it didn't come. Not yet... the devious thing about the machine is, that it doesn't strike immediately, but there's a separate button for that. And contrary to the motor being a little loud, the stroke itself is almost silent. There's a little noise from the arm moving, the swish of the cane and that's it. It all happens so fast, that i'm unable to prepare myself for the impact. So my moans of pain where mixed with yelps from the surprise. It was quite a mind-fuck for me and big fun for Lady Helena!
The new spanking-machine combined with the Delrin rod was a full success. The thin rod delivers a strong sting, while its weight makes sure, that there is also a thud like from a heavy cane and it raises the same red welts. I didn't count the strokes, it might have been a dozen or a little more, but if i'd had the choice, i would have stopped earlier. But i knew, how much fun it was for Lady Helena and that made me endure it. She always manages to push me just a little further every time.
New sissy maid uniform
Domina has used a lot of subliminal training lately and i wonder if i was just obeying a trigger...
The outfit arrived yesterday and i couldn't wait to pick it up after work and try it on. I love how fluffy it is with the petticoat and all the ruffles and i must be careful not to entangle myself when i wear around. I immediately noticed, how it changes the way i move and obviously feeling the satin on my skin made me horny, too.
I took some pictures for Her and photo-shopped myself into one of Her's. I hope She will like it...
Meanwhile, i have found some Delrin rods to use as a cane in my new spanking-machine. They don't break and are more dense than a rattan cane. I tried them mid of last week and i must say, that normal canes feel like toys compared to that. Every stroke left a dark red stripe that i can still feel almost a week later. I stopped after a few stroke, because didn't want to mark myself too much. That's for Lady Helena to do...
I told Her about the results and that we haven't played for too long. I was surprised how eager She was to torture me. She wrote, that She's very frustrated due to our chastity challenge and thus feels moody and that i'll be as pissed and frustrated as She is. Sounds like i should be worried... i'll find out on Thursday...
Chastity Challenge update
The chastity challenge with Lady Helena is on for two weeks now. At first, She had decided that we would tease ourselves for 15 minutes three times a day. That's more opportunity to stroke than i normally get and i'm was sure that i would be able to go a long time with this mode. After a couple of days, Lady Helena wrote and told me that so much teasing was pretty hard for Her since She wasn't used to that. It didn't seem fair for me to have an advantage, so i told Her and suggested to modify the instructions to make it easier for Her and harder for me.
On Thursday i received Her reply and She informed me, that from now on, we will only touch for 20 minutes each Thursday. Following the old instructions, i had already stroked once in the morning and so, there were only 5 minutes left for the evening. Stopping so soon was a bit difficult, but Friday proofed to be even worse. After that much teasing the previous week, my body was craving for it and i already started looking forward for Thursday after only one day.
During the next days, i got used to not touch gradually and when i went to bed last night, i could fall asleep easily without laying awake and having naughty thoughts. Only one day until Thursday and i was confident that i could easily get it over.
Things changed when i found an email from Domina Shelle this morning. She had sent me the outline of a story She is working on. It's about me, serving Her guests as Her maid at a party... Reading it was like reading a summary of my hottest fantasies. If i had written that outline, it would have almost been the same. Do i have to mention how much this turned me on? For the rest of the day, this story has been in the back of my mind, making the day much harder than expected. I can barely wait until being allowed to stroke tomorrow...
Chastity Challenge with Lady Helena
A few minutes ago, Lady Helena informed me, that our chastity challenge has started. I'm excited, because i don't know what's coming. There is no time-frame of any sorts and Domina Shelle had also warned me, the Lady Helena will tease me mercilessly... Both said, that Lady Helena is good at staying chaste, but i don't know, what good means... weeks...? months...? I didn't ask about that intentionally, because the uncertainty adds to the fun.
Having a potentially very long time of chastity ahead, i'm glad, that the Truth or Dare game last weekend allowed me to drain myself and even though, my desire to cum was still low as an effect of the Chastity Lockdown last month, i came 9 times during the weekend and i can enter the chastity challenge without a handicap...
Truth or Dare
Since Lady Helena hadn't fully recovered from here flu, yet, we didn't start our chastity challenge on Monday. We have agreed on a wager now... if i loose, i will pay Her, if i win, i'll get a free call. Of course She will punish me for winning during the call, sounds fair, doesn't it?
The last days, i have been hoping for an assignment or this week's session to contain permission to cum or else, i would have to start the challenge with a little handicap and once again, Domina Shelle seems to be reading my mind and proved a perfect timing.
Yesterday evening, i received an email from Her with a game of 'Truth or Dare'. If i choose truth, i'll have to tell Her the most embarrassing or naughty thing i have done sexually, for dare, i'll 'borrow' a pair of panties from someone and keep it in my car for a week and i'll also have to wear a woman's fragrance whenever i leave the house until Monday.
Since i can't do the later, i'll have to chose truth...
There's a second part to the assignment, i'll have to cum as often as possible during the next 3 days. This will help me a lot with the chastity challenge!
Chastity Lockdown - the Final
The Chastity Lockdown ended on Valentine's Day. When i woke up, i knew that Domina would very likely send instructions to stroke and cum, but even though it had been more than 100 days since my last orgasm, i didn't feel an urge to cum. The training files of the Chastity Lockdown have transferred more control of that urge to my Owner, it's Her decision now if and when i want to cum.
While i was at work, i received the anticipated instructions together with a brainchip update. I read them immediately, i would have to listen to the update 3 times and follow the instructions. There were no details about what would happen, but from that moment on, my desire to cum was suddenly back and i couldn't wait to return home.
Upon returning home, i listened for the first time and it changed all my plans for the evening, because with the brainchip update, Domina triggered my to cum as often as possible within the next 24 hours. So i spent the evening alternating between cumming and listening to the brainchip file and one that Lady Helena had instructed me to follow.
Since Domina had programmed me to slow down with stroking the more aroused i get, it took quite the time to cum and so i managed to cum only 5 times before i had to go to sleep.
Unfortunately, i didn't find time to cum again during the rest of the 24 hours, but the urge drove me crazy. I'm looking forward to the weekend, because Domina has given me an assignment that allows me to cum again. It's a perfect timing, because on Monday, my chastity challenge with Lady Helena will start...
While i was at work, i received the anticipated instructions together with a brainchip update. I read them immediately, i would have to listen to the update 3 times and follow the instructions. There were no details about what would happen, but from that moment on, my desire to cum was suddenly back and i couldn't wait to return home.
Upon returning home, i listened for the first time and it changed all my plans for the evening, because with the brainchip update, Domina triggered my to cum as often as possible within the next 24 hours. So i spent the evening alternating between cumming and listening to the brainchip file and one that Lady Helena had instructed me to follow.
Since Domina had programmed me to slow down with stroking the more aroused i get, it took quite the time to cum and so i managed to cum only 5 times before i had to go to sleep.
Unfortunately, i didn't find time to cum again during the rest of the 24 hours, but the urge drove me crazy. I'm looking forward to the weekend, because Domina has given me an assignment that allows me to cum again. It's a perfect timing, because on Monday, my chastity challenge with Lady Helena will start...
Chastity Lockdown - Final Days
The final days of Chastity Lockdown began on Saturday with the release of the accompanying session.
In the days before, Domina had allowed a bit of edging, which i appreciated a lot, but due to the conditioning from the previous file, i couldn't stroke fast and automatically slowed down, the more aroused i got. It took me very long to reach the edge and it wasn't as satisfying as it normally is.
When i lay down to listen to the new file on Saturday, i was feeling sexually frustrated and looking forward to the Lockdown to end on Valentine's day, but after waking up from the session, things had changed. Like so often, it's hard to remember details, but my need to cum is blown away. I'm still horny, but it's like my brain and body unlearned, that cumming would ease my frustration.
It's really difficult to write down, how exactly this feels, because there seems to be a kind of blockade, that makes it hard to think about cumming, but i know, that from now on, it is my Owner's decision not only when i'm allowed release, but also if and when i want to.
The Lockdown isn't over yet, but i can already testify, that its effects take my servitude to my Owner to a new level. There had already been that connection between being horny and feeling obedient and wanting to make Her happy, but there was always the possibility of being allowed release as a reward. Even though it wasn't my primary motivation in pleasing my Domina, not having to think about it any more (or better not being able to), will help me to focus on serving Her even better.
In the days before, Domina had allowed a bit of edging, which i appreciated a lot, but due to the conditioning from the previous file, i couldn't stroke fast and automatically slowed down, the more aroused i got. It took me very long to reach the edge and it wasn't as satisfying as it normally is.
When i lay down to listen to the new file on Saturday, i was feeling sexually frustrated and looking forward to the Lockdown to end on Valentine's day, but after waking up from the session, things had changed. Like so often, it's hard to remember details, but my need to cum is blown away. I'm still horny, but it's like my brain and body unlearned, that cumming would ease my frustration.
It's really difficult to write down, how exactly this feels, because there seems to be a kind of blockade, that makes it hard to think about cumming, but i know, that from now on, it is my Owner's decision not only when i'm allowed release, but also if and when i want to.
The Lockdown isn't over yet, but i can already testify, that its effects take my servitude to my Owner to a new level. There had already been that connection between being horny and feeling obedient and wanting to make Her happy, but there was always the possibility of being allowed release as a reward. Even though it wasn't my primary motivation in pleasing my Domina, not having to think about it any more (or better not being able to), will help me to focus on serving Her even better.
Chastity Lockdown - Week 3
The second week of Chastity Lockdown is over. My Owner gave me two opportunities to edge, so it felt a bit easier than the first week, but the real tease began on Thursday... Domina released the new monthly training file for Her contracted slaves and with this, She set a starting point for what i expect to be coming this week. The file contains two tracks with Her voice. In one, She is whispering, making me horny and wanting to cum. In the other, She places suggestions of wanting to obey Her and stay chaste.
When i woke up, i felt confused. My mind shifted back and forth between my need to cum and wanting to stay chaste. I couldn't decide, what feeling was stronger, but i don't have to. It's my Owner's decision and i can just follow and accept without needing to think about it.
Week 3 started on Saturday with the release of the accompanying recording and assignment.
I listened as soon as i could on Saturday. The session began with Domina talking a bit, not an induction like i was expecting, but when She suddenly snapped Her fingers and said 'sleep', i was gone. She first continued to take me deeper, only to wake me up again a little later. I was surprised at first, but very delighted, when She told me to stroke slowly. I was just beginning to enjoy the sensations, as She snapped me back to sleep. My body went heavy and She told me to stop stroking.
She began to tease me by making me think about how stroking would feel and my frustration started to build.
A little later, She did it again. Waking me up, letting me stroke a bit, only to drop me down again and tell me to stop...
Luckily, She allowed me to stroke again when i was back in trance and while i was distracted a bit by that, She implanted some wicked suggestions. The first one is, that i will stroke slower the more aroused i get, the second one connects me need to cum with the desire to stay chaste for Her, confusing my mind again about what i really want.
Since She didn't tell me to stop stroking after waking me up, i continued and tested the suggestion and i started to get an idea, how frustrating this third week will be. I wanted to stroke faster so badly, but i hardly could. My arousal faded a bit and that allowed me to increase the speed a bit, but i found, that i was soon slowing down again without noticing. This cycle went on a couple of times and occasionally, i even fell into a short trance and stopped completely.
I finally gave up, more horny and frustrated than before. With this suggestion, my Owner has made it impossible for me to edge and the slow stroking only increases my urge. This will be a very frustrating week...
When i woke up, i felt confused. My mind shifted back and forth between my need to cum and wanting to stay chaste. I couldn't decide, what feeling was stronger, but i don't have to. It's my Owner's decision and i can just follow and accept without needing to think about it.
Week 3 started on Saturday with the release of the accompanying recording and assignment.
I listened as soon as i could on Saturday. The session began with Domina talking a bit, not an induction like i was expecting, but when She suddenly snapped Her fingers and said 'sleep', i was gone. She first continued to take me deeper, only to wake me up again a little later. I was surprised at first, but very delighted, when She told me to stroke slowly. I was just beginning to enjoy the sensations, as She snapped me back to sleep. My body went heavy and She told me to stop stroking.
She began to tease me by making me think about how stroking would feel and my frustration started to build.
A little later, She did it again. Waking me up, letting me stroke a bit, only to drop me down again and tell me to stop...
Luckily, She allowed me to stroke again when i was back in trance and while i was distracted a bit by that, She implanted some wicked suggestions. The first one is, that i will stroke slower the more aroused i get, the second one connects me need to cum with the desire to stay chaste for Her, confusing my mind again about what i really want.
Since She didn't tell me to stop stroking after waking me up, i continued and tested the suggestion and i started to get an idea, how frustrating this third week will be. I wanted to stroke faster so badly, but i hardly could. My arousal faded a bit and that allowed me to increase the speed a bit, but i found, that i was soon slowing down again without noticing. This cycle went on a couple of times and occasionally, i even fell into a short trance and stopped completely.
I finally gave up, more horny and frustrated than before. With this suggestion, my Owner has made it impossible for me to edge and the slow stroking only increases my urge. This will be a very frustrating week...
Chastity Lockdown - Week 2
The last week has been one of the most difficult chastity period i have experienced so far, i almost regret not taking the opportunity to cum, before the chastity lockdown started. I have gone longer before, but Domina did Her best to keep me as horny as possible.
It also seems like She has been playing with my perception of time subliminally, because time seems to crawl and i keep forgetting what day of the week it is, but i have no proof of it.
The first days were still OK, but since Tuesday, the urge to stroke is present almost permanently. One night i lay in bed and my cock went rock hard while i was trying to sleep. It didn't take long until i was on the edge without touching and i felt like i would cum any moment. Then i woke up and realized that i had slipped into sleep and carried the arousal over into my dreams.
During the days, i have little control of my cock. It sometimes gets hard without me having erotic thoughts, other times, nothing happens, even if i'm thinking about sexy things. It's not mine any more, my Owner controls, what i feel...
Today, the second week of the lockdown started. There will be a few opportunities to edge and i'm looking forward to them, but Domina also announced, that there will be additional teasing. This weeks file didn't reinforce the mental chastity device, like i had expected. After taking me into trance and waking me up again a couple of times, Domina let me focus on my desire to cum. A very wicked suggestion given my state of frustration. But She turned my desire against me by making me think about how much better it feels to cum after being denied for some time. Even as i write this, my cock is hard again and i'm horny as hell, but i'm loosing control of my desires and want my Owner to decide what pleasure i get. I'm beginning to understand, that this lockdown is not a game. It's so much more, it will likely introduce a new level of control...
And there is not only the lockdown... Lady Helena has challenged me! She said, that She can stay chaste longer than me. I think, She knows very well, that i can't pass on such a challenge and i'm eager to take it, but i need to ask our Domina about it, it's Her decision...
It also seems like She has been playing with my perception of time subliminally, because time seems to crawl and i keep forgetting what day of the week it is, but i have no proof of it.
The first days were still OK, but since Tuesday, the urge to stroke is present almost permanently. One night i lay in bed and my cock went rock hard while i was trying to sleep. It didn't take long until i was on the edge without touching and i felt like i would cum any moment. Then i woke up and realized that i had slipped into sleep and carried the arousal over into my dreams.
During the days, i have little control of my cock. It sometimes gets hard without me having erotic thoughts, other times, nothing happens, even if i'm thinking about sexy things. It's not mine any more, my Owner controls, what i feel...
Today, the second week of the lockdown started. There will be a few opportunities to edge and i'm looking forward to them, but Domina also announced, that there will be additional teasing. This weeks file didn't reinforce the mental chastity device, like i had expected. After taking me into trance and waking me up again a couple of times, Domina let me focus on my desire to cum. A very wicked suggestion given my state of frustration. But She turned my desire against me by making me think about how much better it feels to cum after being denied for some time. Even as i write this, my cock is hard again and i'm horny as hell, but i'm loosing control of my desires and want my Owner to decide what pleasure i get. I'm beginning to understand, that this lockdown is not a game. It's so much more, it will likely introduce a new level of control...
And there is not only the lockdown... Lady Helena has challenged me! She said, that She can stay chaste longer than me. I think, She knows very well, that i can't pass on such a challenge and i'm eager to take it, but i need to ask our Domina about it, it's Her decision...
Chastity Lockdown
On Tuesday, Domina Shelle opened the sign-up for a new chastity training called Lockdown. She gave Her slaves the option to sign up for one week or until Valentines-day. Of course i chose the long option... The last three days have been a preparation for the lockup with slow masturbation and the option to either cum once each day or stay chaste and only edge. I'm already chaste still end of October, but i decided against cumming. I love the aroused and slightly desperate state i'm in and i also want to prove my obedience by making the lock-down more difficult for me.
I have also continued to listen to Paralysis - Carnal Desire and the effects on my dreams are noticeable. I don't remember many details, but i woke up horny and in a slightly confused state a couple of times and from last night, i remember a little more. I was kneeling at my Owner's feet and started by kissing Her boots until She told me to slowly work up my way on Her legs. I finally found myself with my head between her thighs and She allowed me to pleasure Her while Her foot rested between my legs, slightly pressing down to encourage me. Unfortunately, i woke again at this point and it took me very long to fall asleep again with these images in my head...
This afternoon, i had an impulse to check Her website to see, whether the Lockdown recordings and instructions had already been released and to my delight, they were... i had just started to read the description when my email indicator lit up and the email announcing the lockdown start had arrived. It's not the first time, that i seem to feel it a few seconds before i receive Her instructions and it has also happened with Lady Helena earlier this week. It's a bit spooky...
I immediately downloaded the Lockdown session and started to read the included instructions. There will be a different training session for each week, a new mantra and a daily routine with a thought of the day.
I had to wait until the evening before i could listen to the session, but then, i didn't wait any time and listened to it. It was no surprise, that i woke up in mental chastity, but Domina also used the session to turn me on as much as possible. The last weeks of chastity were not too difficult, but listening to this session daily will change this. I'm still looking forward to being really desperate, but being subjected to this level of teasing for almost four weeks might get more challenging than i thought...
I have also continued to listen to Paralysis - Carnal Desire and the effects on my dreams are noticeable. I don't remember many details, but i woke up horny and in a slightly confused state a couple of times and from last night, i remember a little more. I was kneeling at my Owner's feet and started by kissing Her boots until She told me to slowly work up my way on Her legs. I finally found myself with my head between her thighs and She allowed me to pleasure Her while Her foot rested between my legs, slightly pressing down to encourage me. Unfortunately, i woke again at this point and it took me very long to fall asleep again with these images in my head...
This afternoon, i had an impulse to check Her website to see, whether the Lockdown recordings and instructions had already been released and to my delight, they were... i had just started to read the description when my email indicator lit up and the email announcing the lockdown start had arrived. It's not the first time, that i seem to feel it a few seconds before i receive Her instructions and it has also happened with Lady Helena earlier this week. It's a bit spooky...
I immediately downloaded the Lockdown session and started to read the included instructions. There will be a different training session for each week, a new mantra and a daily routine with a thought of the day.
I had to wait until the evening before i could listen to the session, but then, i didn't wait any time and listened to it. It was no surprise, that i woke up in mental chastity, but Domina also used the session to turn me on as much as possible. The last weeks of chastity were not too difficult, but listening to this session daily will change this. I'm still looking forward to being really desperate, but being subjected to this level of teasing for almost four weeks might get more challenging than i thought...
Hard torture
I'm exhausted... and full of endorphin... Lady Helena caused this in the session we just had.
When we talked before starting the session, She announced, that it would be more fun for Her than for me and i knew that things would be getting intense. Still i was looking forward to have my limits pushed once again.
While i was getting prepared by connecting my estim-device to a butt-plug and rings around my cock, strapping the shock-collar to my thigh and the nipple-puller on my chest, She explained to me, what was going to happen.
I would be bound to the kneeling-post and once She had locked my hands in the stocks behind my back, i would be tortured for 30 minutes while chanting my mantra.
As a little twist, the torture would get more intense the more i would scream...
So i knelt down, strapped my thighs and chest to the post and let Her lock my hands. I started to recite my mantra and for the first few minutes, nothing happened. Then i felt a slight tingle on my thigh that i still could ignore. I heared clicks and knew, that She was adjusting the settings of my devices. The nipple-puller sprang to live and my nipples were stretched a bit, but it was still tolerable and i was looking forward to more pain. I heared more clicks and slowly felt and increasing tingle in my cock. It felt good and concentrating on my mantra was starting to get a bit difficult.
After a few more minutes, the real torture began. She had increased the power of the shock-collar to a level that made me yelp each time and the tingling in my cock had become strong enough to make me drip. I now had to concentrate on not getting too close to the edge, too!
Chanting my mantra was becoming difficult and each time i managed to concentrate again, there were more shocks to distract me. Although i have repeated those lines hundreds of times, i started to make more and more mistakes, mixing things up and starting over from the beginning.
After a few more turns of the nipple-puller, i felt a sharp pain on my left nipple. The clamp had slipped off! Ouch!!! But since the left clamp was still on, there was no reason not to tighten it even more...
I could hear Lady Helena giggling while She increased the power of the estim-device and the frequency of the shocks. A couple of times, She had the estim so high, that i thought, that i would cum soon, but She always turned it off at the right moment, only to start a new cycle.
I think it was after 15 or 20 minutes, when the kneeling position started to add to the torture. It was getting exhausting and my knees started to hurt, but due to the straps, there was no chance to adjust my position. I began to sweat and my whole body was in pain.
Lady Helena was ramping up the torture mercilessly. More pull on my nipples, much more than i had dared to try when i tested the nipple-puller and the estim was now at a level that felt like my cock was in a vice. Only a bit more and She would have forced me to cum. I fought to hold back, because at that level of electricity, and orgasm would be extremely unpleasant! She must have guessed from my voice how close i was, because She stopped the stimulation before it was to late... only to start a new cycle...
By the end of our session, She used the shock-collar on almost every word i managed to utter. I was screaming more than chanting my mantra and i barely managed to complete any sentence. I was unable to think straight, there was only the pain from my nipples and the shocks combined with the intense stimulation of my cock. The world around me was gone, i was in sub-space...
All the sensations together with the knowledge of how much fun Lady Helena was having were overwhelming and at that point, i didn't mind the pain any more, i just felt amazing!
I'm not sure, how long this last stage lasted, but finally the stocks opened and my hands were free. I removed the remaining clover-clamp and didn't even feel the pain that should have been there after having my nipple pulled for half an hour. I was feeling extremely good!
I kept kneeling on the post, while we talked a bit more before saying goodbye and only afterwards, i realized, how sore my knees are now.
But i feel happy, extremely happy... i want to do this again soon!
When we talked before starting the session, She announced, that it would be more fun for Her than for me and i knew that things would be getting intense. Still i was looking forward to have my limits pushed once again.
While i was getting prepared by connecting my estim-device to a butt-plug and rings around my cock, strapping the shock-collar to my thigh and the nipple-puller on my chest, She explained to me, what was going to happen.I would be bound to the kneeling-post and once She had locked my hands in the stocks behind my back, i would be tortured for 30 minutes while chanting my mantra.
As a little twist, the torture would get more intense the more i would scream...
So i knelt down, strapped my thighs and chest to the post and let Her lock my hands. I started to recite my mantra and for the first few minutes, nothing happened. Then i felt a slight tingle on my thigh that i still could ignore. I heared clicks and knew, that She was adjusting the settings of my devices. The nipple-puller sprang to live and my nipples were stretched a bit, but it was still tolerable and i was looking forward to more pain. I heared more clicks and slowly felt and increasing tingle in my cock. It felt good and concentrating on my mantra was starting to get a bit difficult.
After a few more minutes, the real torture began. She had increased the power of the shock-collar to a level that made me yelp each time and the tingling in my cock had become strong enough to make me drip. I now had to concentrate on not getting too close to the edge, too!
Chanting my mantra was becoming difficult and each time i managed to concentrate again, there were more shocks to distract me. Although i have repeated those lines hundreds of times, i started to make more and more mistakes, mixing things up and starting over from the beginning.
After a few more turns of the nipple-puller, i felt a sharp pain on my left nipple. The clamp had slipped off! Ouch!!! But since the left clamp was still on, there was no reason not to tighten it even more...
I could hear Lady Helena giggling while She increased the power of the estim-device and the frequency of the shocks. A couple of times, She had the estim so high, that i thought, that i would cum soon, but She always turned it off at the right moment, only to start a new cycle.
I think it was after 15 or 20 minutes, when the kneeling position started to add to the torture. It was getting exhausting and my knees started to hurt, but due to the straps, there was no chance to adjust my position. I began to sweat and my whole body was in pain.
Lady Helena was ramping up the torture mercilessly. More pull on my nipples, much more than i had dared to try when i tested the nipple-puller and the estim was now at a level that felt like my cock was in a vice. Only a bit more and She would have forced me to cum. I fought to hold back, because at that level of electricity, and orgasm would be extremely unpleasant! She must have guessed from my voice how close i was, because She stopped the stimulation before it was to late... only to start a new cycle...
By the end of our session, She used the shock-collar on almost every word i managed to utter. I was screaming more than chanting my mantra and i barely managed to complete any sentence. I was unable to think straight, there was only the pain from my nipples and the shocks combined with the intense stimulation of my cock. The world around me was gone, i was in sub-space...
All the sensations together with the knowledge of how much fun Lady Helena was having were overwhelming and at that point, i didn't mind the pain any more, i just felt amazing!
I'm not sure, how long this last stage lasted, but finally the stocks opened and my hands were free. I removed the remaining clover-clamp and didn't even feel the pain that should have been there after having my nipple pulled for half an hour. I was feeling extremely good!
I kept kneeling on the post, while we talked a bit more before saying goodbye and only afterwards, i realized, how sore my knees are now.
But i feel happy, extremely happy... i want to do this again soon!
Succubus visit
This week's session is called Paralysis - Carnal Desires. I always can't wait to listen to a new session, but reading the word 'paralysis' made me look forward to it even more. I always love to be paralyzed during a session, it boosts the feeling of being helpless and controlled.
I listened for the first time yesterday and Domina Shelle started to turn my body feeling very heavy from the very beginning of the session and soon, it felt like my mind had forgotten how to move my limbs.
Once i was deep in trance, She created the feeling of a presence sitting heavily on my chest. It was Her, in the form of a succubus. She continued to arouse me, driving me close to the edge and at the same time, She prepare my mind to dream about the succubus visiting me again in my dreams.
The file ended with whispers that reinforced the suggestions i had received. Domina didn't wake me up and so i lay there, remaining paralyzed and in trance. I tried to wake up after a moment, but i was unable to. Any thought i was trying to have vanished immediately. I finally woke up by the noise of the window-blinds going down, i wonder how long i would have stayed in trance without...
Although i rarely have erotic dreams, i was looking forward to one when i went to bed and i was positive, that the suggestions would work. And indeed, i had one, sexier and more vivid than ever before. It started with a Succubus-Mistress having me tied to a post. She told me to look to the floor, so i didn't see Her face, only Her sexy feet in sheer stockings. She began to spank the front of my thighs with a heavy can and i began to whimper. But soon, the pain turned into pleasure and i closed my eyes to really savor it.
Then i was standing on very high heels, with my hands tied to an overhead rail. There must have been some kind of motor, because i was dragged forward and struggled to follow in the high-heels. I walk until i couldn't keep up any more and collapsed into the restraints. The next moment, i was kneeling in front of the Mistress, apologizing for my failure and asking for a punishment.
I woke up at this point, turned on beyond believe and my cock rock hard. I normally turn over when i wake up from a dream and drift of to sleep again, but this time i stayed in the position i woke up in. I'm not sure if i was paralyzed, i didn't think about much besides my arousal and the memories of the dream at that point, but i could imagine, that i was...
I listened again this afternoon, hoping for another dream this night and i'm positive, that it will work again...
I listened for the first time yesterday and Domina Shelle started to turn my body feeling very heavy from the very beginning of the session and soon, it felt like my mind had forgotten how to move my limbs.
Once i was deep in trance, She created the feeling of a presence sitting heavily on my chest. It was Her, in the form of a succubus. She continued to arouse me, driving me close to the edge and at the same time, She prepare my mind to dream about the succubus visiting me again in my dreams.
The file ended with whispers that reinforced the suggestions i had received. Domina didn't wake me up and so i lay there, remaining paralyzed and in trance. I tried to wake up after a moment, but i was unable to. Any thought i was trying to have vanished immediately. I finally woke up by the noise of the window-blinds going down, i wonder how long i would have stayed in trance without...
Although i rarely have erotic dreams, i was looking forward to one when i went to bed and i was positive, that the suggestions would work. And indeed, i had one, sexier and more vivid than ever before. It started with a Succubus-Mistress having me tied to a post. She told me to look to the floor, so i didn't see Her face, only Her sexy feet in sheer stockings. She began to spank the front of my thighs with a heavy can and i began to whimper. But soon, the pain turned into pleasure and i closed my eyes to really savor it.
Then i was standing on very high heels, with my hands tied to an overhead rail. There must have been some kind of motor, because i was dragged forward and struggled to follow in the high-heels. I walk until i couldn't keep up any more and collapsed into the restraints. The next moment, i was kneeling in front of the Mistress, apologizing for my failure and asking for a punishment.
I woke up at this point, turned on beyond believe and my cock rock hard. I normally turn over when i wake up from a dream and drift of to sleep again, but this time i stayed in the position i woke up in. I'm not sure if i was paralyzed, i didn't think about much besides my arousal and the memories of the dream at that point, but i could imagine, that i was...
I listened again this afternoon, hoping for another dream this night and i'm positive, that it will work again...
Spanked and shocked
Today was the first time Domina Shelle used my remote-control system during a call. We had planned that for so long, but there were always circumstances that had prevented us from playing. She had already become a bit jealous that Lady Helena had all the fun...
So i got into position kneeling in front of the spanking-bench and also put the shock-collar around my thigh. "Just in case i want to try it" She said...
I put my hands into the fist-mittens, got them into position on the electromagnet and Domina activated it. This moment always gives me a rush, as i know, that i'll be totally helpless from now on.
Domina Shelle started to take me into a light trance and a bit later, She started to spank and shock me. One might think, that this would wake me up again, but pain alone get get me into a trance-like state and so, both work together very well. Soon i had forgotten my surroundings and was concentrating totally on my Owner's voice and the sensations i felt.
My shock-collar has a built-in buzzer and besides the shock button, i had put two more buttons on the web-interface. One makes the collar beep, the other one beep and shock. I didn't need to explain my intention with these buttons. Domina used the beep&shock function a couple of times, before She started to tease me with only the beep. The shock that i had expected didn't come, but i moaned anyway. Partly in preparation for processing the pain that i was expecting, partly from relief.
Other times, She used the shocks without the beep, giggling about my yelp of surprise and pain. "Awwww, poor baby...". I could hear from Her voice, how She enjoyed the sounds i was making.
"I could just leave you here for 30 minutes and set the spanking-machine on automatic..." She teased me. Although i knew, that She was not serious, the thought of receiving 30 minutes of non-stop spanking crossed my mind. With the machine running at 50 strokes per minute, there would not be much skin left...
She read me a bit from a book with femdom short-stories that i gave Her for Christmas, continuing to spank and shock me. Then She suddenly announced, that She would leave me alone for a few minutes. My headphone went silent and i was left kneeling in front of the spanking bench with my arms stretched out in front of me. I got aware of the stinging sensation off my ass cheeks and wondered, how they might look. But i couldn't check and only wait. Time crawled and i was wondering if my Owner would surprise me with some spanks or shocks. But nothing happened for a long time.
From the position i was in, i couldn't see the clock and i started to wonder if my Owner would really come back. Then, after what felt like an eternity, i heared the spanking-machine come to live. A couple of quick swats, then it stopped again. Then the shock-collar beeped and a moment later, i felt the shock. It didn't really surprise me after the spanks, but then it beeped again without giving me a break. And i felt the shock. And the next beep came immediately. "Please let this only be the teasing beep...", but the shock came too. I was whimpering... Beep, shock, beep, shock, beep shock...
Then i was alone again... my mind started to race... the shocks could come again any moment...
But nothing happened for a long time. I was grateful, that i had cushioned the spanking-bench, but even with cushioning, it got a bit uncomfortable and my elbows began to hurt.
Then, finally, i heared the sound of a skype-message. I tested and my hands were free. I removed the fist-mitts, got back to my laptop and after some final chat, Domina released me with the instruction to listen to Her voice before i go to bed.
I checked my ass-cheeks... they were nicely swollen, enough to give me a nice reminder when i lay in bed later and listen to my Owner's voice...
So i got into position kneeling in front of the spanking-bench and also put the shock-collar around my thigh. "Just in case i want to try it" She said...
I put my hands into the fist-mittens, got them into position on the electromagnet and Domina activated it. This moment always gives me a rush, as i know, that i'll be totally helpless from now on.
Domina Shelle started to take me into a light trance and a bit later, She started to spank and shock me. One might think, that this would wake me up again, but pain alone get get me into a trance-like state and so, both work together very well. Soon i had forgotten my surroundings and was concentrating totally on my Owner's voice and the sensations i felt.
My shock-collar has a built-in buzzer and besides the shock button, i had put two more buttons on the web-interface. One makes the collar beep, the other one beep and shock. I didn't need to explain my intention with these buttons. Domina used the beep&shock function a couple of times, before She started to tease me with only the beep. The shock that i had expected didn't come, but i moaned anyway. Partly in preparation for processing the pain that i was expecting, partly from relief.
Other times, She used the shocks without the beep, giggling about my yelp of surprise and pain. "Awwww, poor baby...". I could hear from Her voice, how She enjoyed the sounds i was making.
"I could just leave you here for 30 minutes and set the spanking-machine on automatic..." She teased me. Although i knew, that She was not serious, the thought of receiving 30 minutes of non-stop spanking crossed my mind. With the machine running at 50 strokes per minute, there would not be much skin left...
She read me a bit from a book with femdom short-stories that i gave Her for Christmas, continuing to spank and shock me. Then She suddenly announced, that She would leave me alone for a few minutes. My headphone went silent and i was left kneeling in front of the spanking bench with my arms stretched out in front of me. I got aware of the stinging sensation off my ass cheeks and wondered, how they might look. But i couldn't check and only wait. Time crawled and i was wondering if my Owner would surprise me with some spanks or shocks. But nothing happened for a long time.
From the position i was in, i couldn't see the clock and i started to wonder if my Owner would really come back. Then, after what felt like an eternity, i heared the spanking-machine come to live. A couple of quick swats, then it stopped again. Then the shock-collar beeped and a moment later, i felt the shock. It didn't really surprise me after the spanks, but then it beeped again without giving me a break. And i felt the shock. And the next beep came immediately. "Please let this only be the teasing beep...", but the shock came too. I was whimpering... Beep, shock, beep, shock, beep shock...
Then i was alone again... my mind started to race... the shocks could come again any moment...
But nothing happened for a long time. I was grateful, that i had cushioned the spanking-bench, but even with cushioning, it got a bit uncomfortable and my elbows began to hurt.
Then, finally, i heared the sound of a skype-message. I tested and my hands were free. I removed the fist-mitts, got back to my laptop and after some final chat, Domina released me with the instruction to listen to Her voice before i go to bed.
I checked my ass-cheeks... they were nicely swollen, enough to give me a nice reminder when i lay in bed later and listen to my Owner's voice...
Happy New Year
a bit late, but: Happy New Year to all my readers!!!
I have used the quiet time between Christmas and New Year to improve my remote control system. I'm working on a scripting system that will allow me control it's functions in conjunction with a playlist of hypnosis files, but most of all, i have build a much better nipple puller...
the old one was mounted to my bed, but the new one isn't stationary any more and it get's strapped to my chest and i'm only limited be the cable.
Besides that, it's crazy strong! The stepper-motor i used is totally overkill, but i had that one in a drawer... i tested with a weight of 5kg and it could lift it without any problems. I think, the aluminum bar will bend before the motor reaches it's limit...
I couldn't make myself go so far to have it pull the clover-clamps off my nipples while i was testing, but i'm sure that will be no problem at all (ouch!).
I can't wait to try it in a session (or rather have it tried on me), although i'm pretty sure, that Lady Helena will prove that it can pull the clamps off... i'm excited by the thought of being unable to stop Her as much as it scares me...
Like every week, Domina Shelle released a new file on Saturday. It's difficult to write about it, because Subliminized is like the title suggests, a subliminal programming. After putting me in deep trance by waking me up and dropping me down repeatedly, Domina's voices faded and i was left alone with Her whispers. At first, i tried to understand Her words, but soon, i zoned out too uch to follow. There are strong amnesia suggestions in this file, so i have no recollection of what She did and whenever i try, the few memories i have dissolve. I can only tell, that i felt totally relaxed and very cozy, almost like after waking up for the first time in the morning and altering between sleep and being awake.
I woke up in a happy state, knowing that i didn't have to worry about what She did. She said, that there will be a second subliminal session (i'm not even sure if that was part of the first one or anywhere else) and i'm looking forward to be Her hypnotic subject again!
I have used the quiet time between Christmas and New Year to improve my remote control system. I'm working on a scripting system that will allow me control it's functions in conjunction with a playlist of hypnosis files, but most of all, i have build a much better nipple puller...
the old one was mounted to my bed, but the new one isn't stationary any more and it get's strapped to my chest and i'm only limited be the cable.
Besides that, it's crazy strong! The stepper-motor i used is totally overkill, but i had that one in a drawer... i tested with a weight of 5kg and it could lift it without any problems. I think, the aluminum bar will bend before the motor reaches it's limit...
I couldn't make myself go so far to have it pull the clover-clamps off my nipples while i was testing, but i'm sure that will be no problem at all (ouch!).
I can't wait to try it in a session (or rather have it tried on me), although i'm pretty sure, that Lady Helena will prove that it can pull the clamps off... i'm excited by the thought of being unable to stop Her as much as it scares me...
Like every week, Domina Shelle released a new file on Saturday. It's difficult to write about it, because Subliminized is like the title suggests, a subliminal programming. After putting me in deep trance by waking me up and dropping me down repeatedly, Domina's voices faded and i was left alone with Her whispers. At first, i tried to understand Her words, but soon, i zoned out too uch to follow. There are strong amnesia suggestions in this file, so i have no recollection of what She did and whenever i try, the few memories i have dissolve. I can only tell, that i felt totally relaxed and very cozy, almost like after waking up for the first time in the morning and altering between sleep and being awake.
I woke up in a happy state, knowing that i didn't have to worry about what She did. She said, that there will be a second subliminal session (i'm not even sure if that was part of the first one or anywhere else) and i'm looking forward to be Her hypnotic subject again!
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